I Made A Commitment To Loving My Boyfriend, And Your Opinion About My Sexual Experience Is Irrelevant

I Made A Commitment To Loving My Boyfriend, And Your Opinion About My Sexual Experience Is Irrelevant

"There is a difference with sleeping with someone and sleeping with someone you love."


Yes, curiosity exists in our everyday lives. It is a natural element that we experience every moment of every day. I find myself being curious as to how my life would be different if I went to a different high school if I hadn't joined the swim team, if I had been born a year earlier or a year later. There is no denial that curiosity plays a large role in who we are, and who we hope to become one day. That being said, that does not mean that I am always curious as to what else is out there. In fact, I am beyond happy in my three and a half year relationship, and I would not change anything for the world.

At a family get together, I was hit with the question of "If you've only ever tasted chocolate, how do you know you don't like strawberry or mint chocolate chip?" Truthfully, this hit me hard. It hit me harder than I would have imagined, and it hit my boyfriend even harder. It was true. We have only ever been with each other, and have only ever experienced each other's bodies. I found myself wondering what else there was, and if I were truly missing out on something. And then I realized something.

Something groundbreaking.

Something that affects me and my relationship positively even to this day. It doesn't and shouldn't matter to me what I am "missing out on," simply because I am so in love with this man. I love everything about him, and I would rather have someone that understands me, my body, and my emotions to rely on, rather than to sleep around with everyone. As it seems, the people who tend to ask my boyfriend and me similar questions to the one mentioned above are individuals who are typically part of the hookup culture.

Because these people are more used to having casual sex, they are not able to fully understand what it is like to feel a deep connection both physically and spiritually with the person they are having sex with. While there is absolutely nothing wrong with people feeling comfortable enough in their body to share their body with multiple individuals, that is not who I am, and something I do not see myself ever being comfortable doing.

The way I see it at least, is that if you love someone and are happy, why worry about what else may or may not be out there? As Bert Lance was once quoted with, "If it ain't broke, why fix it?" In other words, if something is working for you and it is not broken, there is no need to attempt to find a new way to "fix" it. The same can be said for my relationship. While we may argue, at the end of the day, our relationship is held together with our love and support of each other. Therefore, there is no need to search for other experiences when we have found what we believe to be the perfect experience within each other's bodies.

I recognize that I may spend the rest of my life wondering what I could have experienced with other people, but I also recognize that I have a love unlike any other, and that is something beyond special. Being able to share with your future children that you have only spent your life loving and being loved by one person is an extremely emotional concept and one that I can't wait to brag about.

I made a verbal and emotional commitment to spend as much of my life as possible loving him, and your opinion about my sexual experience is irrelevant.

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To The Guy Who Told Me Not To Be Me, Nice Try

He will not silence me.


He told me to never cut my hair short because it would make me look too masculine.

So, I sent him pictures of three different pixie cuts and asked him which one I should get.

He told me not to wear red lipstick because it made me look like a slut.

So, I bought every shade from blush rose to maroon.

He told me not to buy heels taller than one and a half inches tall because it's unattractive for a girl to be taller then the guy she is with.

My favorite shop was having a sell on a beautiful pair of three-inch stilettos. I bought them.

He told me that I was putting on a few extra pounds and that I shouldn't order dessert on our next dinner date.

Did he honestly think I would say no to the red velvet cake that our waitress offered?

He flirted with the waitress, saying that I should "look more like her."

I wrote down his number on our receipt before we left the restaurant.

He told me not to leave my "feminine products" on the counter because it's embarrassing.

When his friends came over for guys night, I organized my tampons and pads nicely on the bathroom shelf.

He told me that I couldn't talk to my best friend of 12 years because he was a guy.

I invited him to watch a movie with us at the local cinema the following week.

He told me not to order wine at the bar with him and his work friends because he didn't want me to seem "trashy."

I ordered jack and coke instead.

He told me not to be a feminist because it meant that I thought I was better than him.

My new "GIRL PWR" shirt is my favorite.

He told me to be silent.

He told me that I think too much and that I speak what I think too often.

He told me nobody cares about what I have to say.

He told me that the things I say don't matter.

So, I wrote a poem about him.

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A Well-Deserved And Long Overdue Thank You To My Boyfriend

I know it's cliché, but he deserves it.


Thank you for choosing me and loving me unconditionally every day. I do not deserve the love that you radiate, but I am beyond thankful for it. Thank you for showing me kindness in every action and for listening to every pointless story I have. Thank you for being the person I can go to 24/7 with any piece of news. Thank you for being the only person who can make me laugh when I am not in the mood at all. Thank you for picking up all of my pieces and wiping all of my tears. Thank you for making sure I always feel loved.

Thank you for believing in pinky promises just as much as I do and for making sure you never break them. Thank you for always reassuring me even though it gets annoying. Thank you for believing in me and pushing me out of my comfort zone. Thank you for knowing when I need a confidence boost, when I need a push, or when I just need a shoulder to cry on. Thank you for taking the time to learn everything about me.

Thank you for never giving up on me no matter how grumpy I get or how hard our week has been. Thank you for never going to sleep mad and always saying "I love you" before we leave. Thank you for the tight squeezes and play fights. Thank you for the deep belly laughs and jam sessions in the car. Thank you for the late-night phone calls when I can't sleep and for doing everything you can to make me better when I'm sick. Thank you for loving me no matter what and no matter when. Thank you for all of the memories. Thank you for holding on tight and never letting go.

Thank you for being everything I could ever want and for showing me what love really is.

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