I have been an only child with a single parent then with two functioning parents. My parents split up before I was born leaving my mom with no opportunity to give me a fully biological sibling. She dated around and so did my father but in sixth grade they ended up with each other once again. At this point I was in my tweens and not in the mood to deal with a baby and neither were they.

As I got older I became the classic moody teenage girl who never met her parents expectations. Those expectations were very clear so I knew right away whether or not I had met them. My mother wanted straight A's, a strong athlete, a daughter active in clubs and a model child. My father wanted a daughter who didn't challenge him, straight A's, an athlete who worked night and day to perfect their skills, an amazing child and a son.

I love both of my parents dearly but the expectations that they held were unreachable for just one child. A sibling would have set me free because very time I messed up I hear "You are our only shot, you can't mess up because that means I messed." To be honest I still hear my mother saying that phrase when I fail a test, make a wrong choice or say the wrong thing. The pressure to be perfect fell heavy on my shoulders.

I was three sport varsity athlete the last two years of high school and a three sport athlete all of high school. My team and I won state, district and conference titles almost every year. I was an all star in two of my sports multiple times and was named captain of field hockey my junior year. I had average grades, a good group of friends and got average grades. What my parents saw was the average part of my life. All kids played sports so I needed to be the one who practiced on her off days, all kids had test so I needed to study before I even the knew of the test, I needed to be in more clubs and I needed to be liked by everyone. These were not only my thoughts but they were the words of my parents. I know they meant well, they wanted me to be the best version of myself for my well being and to show the world that they were the best versions of themselves.

Everyday I felt like I needed to live up to my parents unrealistic expectations but eventually I realized their expectations were too much for one child to bear. I began to not care. My senior year of high school I gave up on a lot of things. My grades didn't matter to me, I still played three sports but I only cared about one, I gave up on how people viewed me because I knew that being the perfect child was unreachable.

When I began college I felt free. Everything was now for me. I quit all sports, which broke my parents hearts and trust me I got lectured almost every break about how I wasted my talent. I worked hard in school because I want to get a good job when I graduate. I applied for multiple jobs becauseI was never allowed to work in high school. I had to focus on my sports and my work. I fell in love with a guy I know I am going to marry. My mother never approved of me falling in love but she wasn't at college with me.

My only child syndrome destroyed me in high shcool. I never felt like anything I did was for me it was always for my parents or for the people judging me. I had to reach those expectations to be great in my parents eyes and in life. In my years of somewhat adulthood (18 and 19) and in college however, my only child pushed me to work for myself. I began to live for myself and do what I wanted. At the age of 19 I have fourteen piercing and six tattoos, with more on the way. Yes I do still thrive to meet my parents as all children do but I could no longer bare all of their expectations.