The modern age of technology has changed the way we live our lives. Students have access to a cornucopia of information at their finger tips, business professionals can hold meetings with each from different parts of the world and you don't have to be Louis and Clark to navigate your way through America. While all of these technological advances have made the way we live easier, there is one software category that I am still skeptical about: online dating.
In high school, I joked around a little bit and made a Hot or Not account. Similar to Tinder (though not nearly as popular anymore), the user views the profile of another user (based primarily off of pictures) to determine whether they are "Hot," or "Not" (hence the name). It was kind of fun to mess around with it, but it always bothered me how shallow apps like Hot or Not, and Tinder seemed. However, having recently rejoined Tinder, I've come to a new understanding.
"Like or dislike" dating apps reflect upon attraction in the real world. Think about it. When you walk down the street, you may be drawn to a particular person. What is it about that person that made you overlook the others surrounding him/her? More often than not, it is some sort of physical trait. Their radiant smile or piercing blue eyes perhaps. Tinder itself is not shallow. It doesn't encourage users to "swipe left." We are the ones in control of who we "swipe right" for. You also have the advantage of reading a user's bio, which is basically the equivalent of having limited mind-reading abilities in real world encounters.
Speaking of bios, from my experiences using online dating sites (primarily OkCupid and Tinder), I have noticed some common trends. To give some context, I am a straight male using these sites. The only reason I am addressing this is because I have rather limited insight into what users with other sexual preferences face using dating apps and websites.
What typically strikes me as a turnoff is when users vomit their political views all over their bios. Don't get me wrong, I think it's great that social media sites give people an outlet to share their opinions with a mass audience. However, online dating sites should not be the place. "If you voted for Trump, swipe left," is a statement I saw on at least three profiles in a single day. Even though I didn't vote for Trump, they make it seem as though, if you voted for anyone other than Hillary, you won't likely be on their good side.
Another annoying statement, one that short guys such as myself face on a regular basis is, "if you're shorter than me, swipe left." Personally, I don't care about height. Dating a girl taller than me will not hurt my pride. Unfortunately, it is one of those stigmas that society has implanted in us. Short is synonymous with "inadequate" and "disadvantaged." While being short seems to condense my dating pool, it lets me know who will actually care about the person I am, instead of how high I stand off of the ground.
The other trend that personally turns me off is "420 friendly," which really means, "I hope you smoke as much as I do." I suppose this isn't as irritating as the previously mentioned trends. After all, recreational marijuana and alcohol use gives people something to bond over. As someone who considers himself "straight-edged" (check out my article "My Life as a Martial Artist" for more background about my lifestyle), however, it nauseates me to see it come up so often.
Having said all of this, a wonderful advantage with online dating is that you typically get more information up front. You can make a better judgement based off of a person's interests and lifestyle before you pursue any further, as opposed to a random person you flirt with at the supermarket. Do be wary, however, of scammers and users with false accounts.
While I have had little success with online dating, my own experiences with these sites gave me a bit of insight. These apps have broadened my horizon on all of the interesting people not too far from where I stand. Also, having the ability to chat with users who share common interests is pretty fun.
Tinder and OkCupid aren't necessarily sites that will guarantee any meaningful relationships, so perhaps being skeptical isn't quite fair. If it ever comes down to me using more "serious" dating sites in the future, such as eHarmony, and Match, I will put their high claims to the test. Until then, I'll continue to be a free-spirited college student, using these sites for nothing more than pure enjoyment.
