Since I was little, I have always been a fan of learning new words. Much like other kids, I subconsciously integrated words I learned from listening to adults talk and from reading books straight into my verbal vocabulary. My only friend in Kindergarten was the teaching assistant, not because I was anti-social, rather, because other five-year-olds did not want to talk about the things I wanted to talk about, nor did they understand the words I used to talk about them.
We adopt the words and phrases of the material with which we surround ourselves. I, personally, have always really loved to read books, specifically realistic fiction, and also just non-fiction. I have also always liked to watch documentaries and talk about things that really make you think. With these "high-level" conversations came "high-level" vocabulary. When I was young, the phrase people used for this was "highly gifted," whereas, as I got older, it started to be called being "old for my age" or "mature for my age," and that never made sense to me.
Thusforth, I was always treated as someone older than I actually was. This has nothing to do with my look, as I have quite a youthful face, and has entirely to do with the fact that if you talk like an adult, people are quick to treat you like one. This can be a good thing, especially when applying for jobs, but in other times, it just makes life really hard.
The other day I was told I was "intimidating" because of the way I talk. One adult who I really respect said it was because I "have the vocabulary to articulate exactly what I want to say and use it," and I really appreciated her putting it this way. I guess I had never really thought about it that way before.
The one issue is this. Sometimes, I just really want to be nineteen. Sometimes I want people to treat me as someone still experiencing youth and discovery. Sometimes, I want people to stop equating my vocabulary and interests with my ability to work with them or date them. Sometimes, I want people who are older than me to feel like my elders and not my peers.
When you meet me, remember this; none of this is on purpose. None of this is something I "put on" or something I do for attention or to "seem" older. It is just who I am; I am an academic personality, but I am still nineteen.
