I’ve spent all 20 years of my life calling Oklahoma home, and I am usually quite cynical about my home-state. In my defense, this cynicism is justified. What with Oklahoma’s high incarceration rate, barely-funded public education, and the most ridiculous weather patterns in North America. But recent events have shown me the upside of being Oklahoman.

Last week was Oklahoma State University’s homecoming celebration, which included a parade through the campus in Stillwater, OK. It would have been just a typical college game day if not for a driver going through the barricade and injuring several of the parade spectators and killing three. It’s one of those tragedies that hits you, and has your mother send an out-of-the-blue “I love you” text. Among the people harmed at the parade were three family members of one of my friends from high school, with whom I went to church. When something that terrible happens to people you know, it shakes you.

I don’t want to write more about why or how this happened—plenty of other people have done that. I want to share what I have noticed in the aftermath this week.

It’s when things like this happen that people really come together, especially Oklahomans. Communities on campuses and churches and little towns come together to help heal. The family I mentioned? People have already raised over $15,000 to help them with expenses in less than a week. A prevailing theme of politics here entertains an “us v. them” mentality, but the bottom line—Oklahomans take care of each other. We Oklahomans are ultimately a caring people.

We have a love here that's often called the Oklahoman Standard. It’s that love that broke down bedlam this past week, brought a state together after a terrorist attack on the Murrah building (while I was still in utero), and inspired people to help the entire city of Moore after it was devastated by a tornado. Oklahoma can have this sweet combination of Southern hospitality and Midwest coziness, not only when big scary things happen, but smaller things as well. The same love that gathers people together when the tragedies happen is always at work on the day-to-day. In the past two decades, I’ve experienced several instances of the cozy and hospitable Oklahoma standard: the countless casseroles and dinners people made when one of my parents was sick, the quilt and scrapbook I received as high-school graduation gifts, and I always have a place to stay when I visit Skiatook, OK.

I’ll admit, Oklahoma as whole isn’t perfect. No place is. We as a state still have a lot to do. But, c’mon, we’re only 108 years old, practically a child in government years.

If you want to help some of the victims of the OSU tragedy, please consider donating to a gofundme to help with medical expenses: https://www.gofundme.com/tr72vmd4