As summer winds down, I look forward to the year and the experiences ahead of me. I look forward to reconnecting with friends, returning to campus, facing the inevitable challenges and all the times that will better shape me in the coming year.
But when I consider my feelings 12 months ago, my state of mind was far different. I lacked the excitement and hope that should have accompanied my transition. Now that it's a year later I want to share with students who may be having the same feelings I was that it's okay.
1. It's okay to have fears
There were many fears I built in my head leading up to move in. But overall I'd say I was mostly nervous that I wouldn't find friends right away. I was under the impression that everyone would know one another and somehow I'd be the one person on campus without close friends. I realized quickly this was a little far-fetched. The truth is that everyone is in the same situation, everyone's transitioning, and therefore everyone has their own worries.
2. It's okay to feel alone and seem lost
Even if you're entering school with people you've known for years, it's okay to feel like you're a little alone. It is different from the past 18+ years under your parents' roof. You may begin to distance yourselves from those that you know, and that's okay too. The last 18 years were probably familiar to you and the truth is college isn't exactly planned out. You're around thousands of new people with a schedule that you don't quite understand while facing new things every day. It's overwhelming but doesn't get down on yourself because of it.
3. It's okay to change
"College changed you," is a phrase you'll probably hear in the upcoming months. And I think too often we give it a negative connotation. But college is definitely a time to change. I was entering a place where I knew no one, completely escaping the world of high school. For this reason, I had the chance to really feel out my interests and aspirations. This is the chance to become yourself – college changing you may just mean it's allowing you to become you.
4. It's okay to doubt your initial plans
The question was daunting and frustrating the weeks surrounding graduation of "what are you going to study?" and "what are your plans?" For some, we came up with an answer to please and pushed off the thought. But now as you enter freshman year, it's time to put your plan into action. Although you may be set in mind for what you want to do, it's okay to doubt it come time for classes. Your major may turn out to be far more complex and far less interesting than you first anticipated – in fact, it probably will at some point. So don't feel set in your initial plans, get a feel for it and if it doesn't seem right it's okay to change.
5. It's 100 percent okay to miss home
Even though I quickly adapted to my new surroundings, I still had moments where I really just wanted to be at home. I wanted my mom's pasta, my dad's hugs, my conversations with my brothers and the excitement of being with my high school friends on any given night. Even if you have it all together, you'll probably miss the little things.
So yes it is okay that you don't feel ready and it's okay to feel other emotions rather than just excitement. But remember you aren't alone. And give it time because I think you'll find that the experience is more than you ever hoped.
