I am not a writer, a journalist, or a reporter. I am a girl who loves to write to express her feelings, because most of the time, she's too afraid to say them out loud. Is that cowardly? Maybe. But putting your words out there for hundreds of thousands of people to read, is vulnerable. I don't think there is a single cowardly thing about letting people in.

So, I wrote an article. I wrote a piece so far out in left field that I questioned if they were really even my words. I wrote to be a voice; a voice for people who were too afraid to speak. I know I should never regret that, but at times I do.

My anxiety is pretty manageable, but some days it can be crippling. When I know I have upset someone, that's when it kicks into full gear. My biggest fear is hurting someone, and I would rather suffer in silence than to hurt someone else.

So, when my words went viral, I know I should have been ontop of the world. I had writers from each and every direction congratulating me for my "success".

Success? What the heck is successful about causing a ruckus? I'm the girl who sits in the back of the room, never finding the courage to speak up or draw attention to myself. No, thank you! I'll keep my head down and go about my way without anyone knowing who I am.

But now I have this big, loud voice that follows me wherever I go, a voice I'm not used to hearing. I'm used to hearing my typical anxiety voice in my head nagging me 24/7 about all the things I have to do, or reminding me of all the things I've done wrong. I'm used to that voice.

Now I hear a voice that is telling me I have to fit this standard of being a "good writer". I have been totally avoiding writing anything because I'm scared. I'm a stream of consciousness writer. I write from my heart, and I write about real and raw emotions. Most of the pieces I write are meant to reach people who are facing the same struggles as me; a 21-year-old college student busting her butt to figure everything out.

I write about times when life really sucks, and I write about times when my happiness is immeasurable.

Right now, I can't even think of a title for this article. I feel embarrassed. I feel like no one really cares about what I write now unless it's relevant or controversial. But that just isn't my style. So here I am, working up the courage to write about how my "five minutes of fame" has affected me.

I feel pathetic. I have seen the things people, people who I considered friends for years, write about my article on social media. They were saying I had no idea what I was talking about, or I was causing trouble, or I was being overly sensitive. It's hard to shake reading things like that.

I'm constantly reminded every time I'm upset, outraged, happy; I have an outlet and I have this platform. Sometimes, I feel like my Odyssey articles are my open diaries for anyone to read. I never intended for any of this commotion to happen. Now I just have to roll with it.

I have received tremendous amount of support from the University, thanking me for speaking out. One even said I was courageous for being a voice for so many student-athletes because there are many more who aren't speaking up about things that are bothering them. I told the kindest, most caring woman that I was sorry and I was too afraid to write anymore. She assured me that she was once in my shoes, having to speak up about something she was passionate about.

At the time, it was hard for her, but she wouldn't be where she is today (very high up in the University), and she learned so much by finding her voice. I look up to her and admire her strength. She is empowering. She too loves to write to express herself.

So, maybe I am a writer. No, it's not what I'm studying in college, but I know somewhere down the line it will pay off. Right now, I feel like I'm walking through a cloud of neverending smoke. I'm not sure how to make sense of any of this, but writing has helped me in more ways than I'm even able to describe.

"When I am writing, I am trying to find out who I am, who we are, what we're capable of, how we feel, how we lose and stand up, and go on from darkness into darkness. I'm trying for that." - Maya Angelou

I have this talent, I have this voice, I have this little itty bitty power to make a difference when I set my mind to it. Regardless of the comments made, or internal guilt, I refuse to stop writing; because this cloudy storm that feels blinding and crippling will pass. I know the other side is bright and is waiting for me to own my voice.