Ode To Wades Of Spartanburg
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Ode To Wades Of Spartanburg

When in doubt, Wades it out.

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Ode To Wades Of Spartanburg
Caroline Newlon

“Wades gives rise to a feeling that so vividly takes me back to weekends at my Grandmother’s. The only difference is the Wades employees don’t blow smoke in my face and yell ‘Eat up! You're too damn skinny’” (Thomas Lynch, Wofford class of 2018 and Wade's connoisseur).

“As a frequent visitor of Wades, it is no question that each experience is better than the last. I discover vegetables that I never knew were vegetables like macaroni and cheese. I can eat six rolls in one sitting. Each time I eat Wades, I leave a better person, student, and humanitarian. I owe Wades for making me into the woman I am today. Thank you, Wades” (Olivia Vasquez, Wofford class of 2018 and Wades connoisseur).

On Saturdays (or “Saturwades,” as it has come to be called), a group of students who have dubbed themselves “The Meat n’ Three” gather together and mosey on down to the home of some of the comfiest southern cuisine in Upcountry South Carolina. It is an honor and a privilege to be a part of this close-knit society of Wade's goers. The group has been so gracious to share order-related advice and a detailed account of the Wades experience.

Wade's, this one is for you.

There is no feeling like that I’m going to Wades feeling. Walking through the welcoming doors, to the right can be a seen a wall of notable Wade's employees which serves as a reminder that not all heroes wear capes. The surrounding walls are given life with cartooned vegetables which prepare you for the colorful side dishes that compliment every entree. As you wait in a line of tasteful people like yourself, you envision what is to come: that fine tastin’ southern sweet tea, cornbread and yeast rolls, and other items that I will soon pay special tribute to. You are escorted by your waiter/waitress through food-blessed tables and as you pass by your fellow connoisseurs, you let the people know who you are as you proudly exclaim, “VIP! Excuse me, VIP coming through!” Your waiter/waitress smiles out of obvious appreciation for your valuable status. As she stretches our her arm to designate your table, her mouth says, “Here you are,” but her eyes say, “Your throne awaits.” You sit. “Drinks?” Treat yourself to a beverage that will do you in. Order the sweet tea. Just do it. “Cornbread, rolls, or a mix?” She asks with a pen to paper. She dares not get your order wrong. Without hesitation, you respond, “I don’t discriminate.” With a wink and a smile, she is off. Your friends gaze upon you with expressions of immense appreciation and respect. You have only a few moments to settle in, because, within seconds, the holy grail of Wades is placed before you — an unbeatably fresh combination of rolls and cornbread. Don’t be shy. Grab the butter. Grab the jam. Be true to yourself. Before you take your first sip of that palatable sweet tea, you respectfully raise your cup and make a toast to the restaurant that keeps your world spinning. Now, take that sip-o-tea. Mmm, good. You enjoy conversation over bread and drinks for a generous wait of only five minutes and then SHAZAM! Your food has arrived. Do not worry. You ordered well. The legendary meat n’ three is the rewarding road you chose. You had so many options, but you are a true food intellectual. You knew to get the fried chicken. You were amazed to look under the vegetable choices and discover that macaroni and apple cobbler are in fact greens. You ordered those items along with the sweet potatoes. You look down at your plate in unshakable awe. How could anything be so beautiful? You realize in this very moment that everything is indeed right and well in the world. You grab your fork. You eat. You live.

It is no wonder that Wades has been deemed the greatest, most crucial course to take at Wofford College. Located only 1.5 miles from campus, it is a quick trip to The Promised Land. Perhaps this seems to be an overstatement, but several Wades fans have assured me that anything less would be an understatement. Wade's can be compared to behind the counter drugs. It is definitely addictive (ask my bank account), frequent use may cause weight gain (ask my scale), and side effects do include drowsiness (ask my attendance record). However, appropriate dosage and diligent use can take a struggling college student a long way. Fraternities have your dream girls. I may never be one, but you will not catch me losing sleep over it. I will always be a Wade's dream girl. I may have failed my biology exam, but you will not find any sweat on my brow, for I will never fail Wades. Friends come and go, but hey, Wades will always be there. I would like to encourage all Wofford students to take the Wades challenge. Go eat. Go live.

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