I Would Not Last One Day At The North Pole
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Call Me A Cotton-Headed Ninny Muggins, But I Would Not Last One Day At The North Pole

Buddy the Elf may be more talented than we give him credit for.

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Call Me A Cotton-Headed Ninny Muggins, But I Would Not Last One Day At The North Pole
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQ7bmbmlFnU

As Christmas quickly approaches, there is one face I seem to see around every corner: Santa Claus. I see him when I pass store windows, as I watch any Christmas movie, and every time I open a can of Coke. The big guy gets a lot of attention, even though he only works one night a year. So what about those little guys who work day-after-day, giving up all their free time so little Timmy can have the skateboard he has been dreaming about?

Do you have any idea what Santa's elves go through?

After an in-depth analysis of the most elf-educational movies, such as "Fred Claus," "The Polar Express," and the well-loved "Elf," I have quickly discovered I would stand no chance as one of Santa's workers. First, let us go back to the work hours. In Christmas movies, how often do you see an elf watching the game with his buddies? Rarely. No, every time they even show an elf, that guy is hard at work on some etch-a-sketch or hula-hoop that the recipient will probably forget about come January, especially when the child realizes no one actually uses etch-a-sketches anymore.

The elves do not even get Christmas day off. I think we can all recall one of the first scenes in "Elf" when Santa announces this year was a success, so what else would be better to do now (after an entire year of doll-dress-sewing and jack-in-the-box-testing) than getting started on toys for next year? Of course, the naturally chipper elves were more than excited to pick up their tiny hammers once again. I, on the other hand, would have choked on the gingerbread man I was eating, likely the first meal I had time to eat since Thanksgiving (the toy-making business is brutal,) made a snarky comment, and eventually faked the flu to receive paid leave.

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Quite frankly, the other elves would likely appreciate me taking time off. What would I even bring to the table? I can't build a rocking horse. I still have trouble working liquid glue. And the elves seem all happy and forgiving, but you know the second I put a Barbie Dream House door on backward, some little elf with a clipboard and an "I need to speak to your supervisor" haircut would shut me down. From then on, I would be put on "Can you get that off the top shelf for me?" duty, since I am the only person over five-feet in a mile radius.

Nonetheless, the elves would make for great friends and co-workers, even if they do have odd affinities for tights and pointy hats. They have permanent smiles on their faces, and always seem to be humming a peppy holiday tune. After all, it is Christmas all the time for these guys. Could you imagine? Constant jingle bells and lights and candy canes.

I would go crazy.

There is no way I could ever spend 365 days (plus one extra on leap years) listening to all 48 remixes of "Here Comes Santa Claus" and watching the claymation "Rudolph the Rednose-Reindeer" on repeat. You would catch me hiding out in the reindeer stables binge-watching season five of "Grey's Anatomy" with Donner (who I personally believe to be the sassiest reindeer) as we plan our escape and trash-talk the overrated Rudolph. That guy just thinks he's so great because he has a flashlight built into his head...

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But, as for my elf friends, don't underestimate them so much. They may just be the extras in every Christmas movie known to man, but they are the glue (which I still cannot properly work) that holds Santa's schedule from falling apart and deserve a little respect. Buddy may seem clueless, and that little guy from "Rudolph the Red-Nose Reindeer" who wants to be a dentist may have the voice of a young child who swallowed a kazoo, but they are both far more skilled and dedicated to their jobs than most of us will ever be.

As the elves work away, I will be spending this holiday season doing what I do best: watching half of a Hallmark movie before I get bored, eating a variety of cookies I probably did not bake, and pushing on every single "pull" door I come to while in the mall attempting to find the perfect gift for loved ones (Mom, don't get too excited. You and I both know it's just another book I want you to read and you're too nice to admit you don't care for.)

So while you are being festive (and hopefully a little lazy) on Christmas day, show a little appreciation for those who are unable to because they are either deployed to a less-friendly environment or are lending a helping hand to keep those in your community safe. Santa and his elves are not the only ones who have to work on Christmas day.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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