You might not be ready for a relationship.
Start writing a post

Have you recently been asked out, but something doesn't feel right, so you reject the person? You then spend hours wondering why you don't want to, falling into a pit of "I'm not attracted to them" and "but they're super nice, should I just give them a chance?"

Does it not feel like your time to start dating? Do you feel like you're unsure of how things would turn out afterwards?

Well if you're not too keen to the dating scene, and don't think you're ready, here are a few tell-tale signs that you shouldn't commit.

You fear you'll lose your independence.

Giphy

You enjoy doing things by yourself and realize that you don't have to have another person attached at your side to have fun. You like being the one who sets the rules, and there's nothing wrong with that. Just know that if the person is right, they'll respect you as an individual and not try to crawl up your butt half of the time. You'll have that time to yourself too.

You've rejected several people.

Giphy

It's not that people aren't interested, it's that you're not interested. You're still figuring yourself out, and you don't need a distraction on that journey. Sometimes you're just not ready to even sit down on a casual date. That's fine too.

You feel like you're not ready for a commitment.

Giphy

That's also something to work through. You might be the person who casually dates, but probably can't handle the label of a relationship right now. Committing to one person is tough if you've never done it before.

Attention could freak you out.

Giphy

If you're anything like me, unnecessary attention kind of freaks me out. That's the biggest reason that I don't like my birthday. If you have similar feelings, having many or even one person show you attention is something that needs a gentle stoke to the fire, a slow burn.

The overall idea of it seems kind of scary.

Giphy

Giving yourself to someone is a lot to handle. You're putting your faith in that one person, your trust. What if they betray that trust? What if you make the wrong choice when it comes down to the wire? There will always be so many "what if's", and not enough reassurance. But, sometimes you have to have a hell of a lot of hope.

You've based your idea of relationships off of others around you.

Giphy

You've seen your friends or members of your family go through some gnarly relationships, adding to the predisposed fear that things won't work out or that you shouldn't trust anyone. While it is good to take notes of what is good and bad in other's relationships for future reference, it's not good to live in constant worry. Not every relationship is the same. Not every person is a wolf in sheep's clothing. Don't let other's failed relationships dictate how you pursue yours.

Just take notes and move forward. You'll find someone to love and trust, one that returns the same. You'll find someone to laugh with, even in the worst moments. You'll find that person to hold you tight when things get way too real.

But, if any of these sound like you, you should take some time to work on yourself before jumping into a relationship. You're constantly growing and maturing, so there's nothing wrong with taking your time on things.

I wish you luck in your personal growth and finding your person.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Today is Bisexuality Day and I'm more than ready to give all the bisexuals some love by breaking the stigma. I see you, I hear you, I appreciate you.

Bisexuliaty is a sexual orientation where people can form attraction and/or relationships to more than one gender. More than half of the LGBTQ+ community identifies as bisexual but it comes with a ton of bias, discrimination, and violence. And, honestly, bisexuals tend to be forgotten becuase bi-erasure wants to hold onto biphobia to question the existence and legitimacy of bisexuality.

Keep Reading... Show less
Swoon

5 Couples Get Real About Canceling Their Dream Weddings Because Of COVID-19

"It definitely reinforced that as long as we have each other, we can make it through anything together."

183
Courtesy of Georgia & Mike Bernstein

There isn't one person the coronavirus (COVID-19) pandemic hasn't affected. While COVID-19 is risking everyone's physical health, it's also destroying the world's economy and personal finances, weakening mental health, wreaking havoc on education... and, well, the list goes on.

Among the many things being impacted is love.

Keep Reading... Show less
Swoon

A Couple's Wedding In Peru Was Postponed By COVID-19, But A Lifetime Of Love Is Worth The Wait

"We'd prefer to wait and have the wedding that both of us have always thought of."

96
Courtesy of Rory Semple

During their first semester at Instituto de Empresa (IE Business School) while working on graduate degrees in Madrid, Spain, soon-to-be-newlyweds Rory and Gigi met when they were placed in a workgroup together — and the rest was history. Now, four years after their relationship began, the couple's fall plans to get married in Perú, where Gigi is originally from, have since been postponed by COVID-19.

Though things haven't always been easy for the pair because of immigration, starting a skincare business together, and now, canceling their dream wedding because of the pandemic, they have always worked together as a team (maybe we should all be in a workgroup with our future spouses).

Keep Reading... Show less
Swoon

A Bumble Couple's Wedding Was Canceled By COVID-19, But Nothing Could Come Between This Perfect Match

"The whole purpose of all the stress and time and tears was that we love each other and that was all that mattered."

210
Courtesy of Shanna and Kaihla

Shortly after Kaihla's sister made her a dating profile on Bumble (despite her fear of being catfished), she matched with Shanna, and their chemistry was quickly undeniable. So much so that only a month and a half into dating, Shanna told her best friend "I think I'm going to marry her," and eventually, the nonprofit worker and elementary PE teacher duo proved this to be true.

In the fourth episode of a new docuseries called "Pandemic Weddings" by SoulPancake, the couple opens up about how they met, the difficulties of canceling a non-refundable wedding of their dreams (that took a year and a half to plan), as well as the pain of having family members who didn't support their marriage use the pandemic as a convenient excuse not to come.

Keep Reading... Show less
Bobbie Hall

This fall was my boyfriend and I's two-year anniversary! In the past for special occasions, we've typically gone out for a movie and dinner or just did something fun in general. However, in the year of COVID, we didn't really feel safe doing something like that.

Instead, we wanted to try something new that kept us significantly more socially distanced. Luckily, I found a TikTok trend a few months ago that gave me the perfect idea! The Target TikTok trend blew up all over for couples and friends alike. It seemed like a fun activity for us but also a good way to get each other gifts that we might not have thought about.

Keep Reading... Show less

If there's one thing everyone's talking about right now, it's voting — in real life, on social media, and yes, even on dating apps.

And rightfully so! Because is there really anything sexier than someone who cares about using their voice to be the change they want to see? In my opinion, no... not much, honestly.

Keep Reading... Show less
Tai Adaya

Any medium- to dark-skinned woman knows how difficult it can be to find the right SPF. Most mass-market SPF products are catered to lighter skin tones, and the potent UV-blocking titanium dioxide and zinc oxide have a way of leaving an unflattering white or grey cast on the skin.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

10 Fall Fashion Trends Every Stylish Closet Needs This 2020 — Here Are Options For EVERY Budget

Whether you're on a budget or willing to splurge, you can attain the perfect fall wardrobe with these pieces!

87

Even if the only time you're leaving the house is to go to the grocery store, I'm a firm believer in getting dressed up to make yourself feel better. With these trends, your Insta feed (and followers) will be thanking you.

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics and Activism

Florida Residents, Here Is Your Step-By-Step Guide For Registering To Vote

Every state is different, so get familiar with your county's regulations early!

566

The 2020 presidential election is coming up fast and it's important now more than ever to know the resources available to voters. With COVID-19, this election looks a bit different this year — mail will be slower, and polls will have longer lines and more health and safety regulations. Because of this, knowing where to register if you haven't already, checking your registration status, and requesting a vote-by-mail ballot is crucial information to be aware of.

Each state has different links and different websites, so this information primarily pertains to Florida residents.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments