How many times have you told a friend as she is leaving your apartment, “don’t get raped!” Hilarious am I right? No. The sad thing is people do think this type of rape-joke culture is okay and should be tolerated. But it shouldn’t. People say this like it is the person's choice whether or not they would like to be sexually assaulted.
Growing up you are taught what you should or shouldn't do in order to prevent the wrong type of attention. Wear clothing that covers you up, leaving more for the imagination and less for the eye.
We have learned the golden rule at a young age that we continue to carry with us today: Don’t walk alone, especially at night and have a buddy system.
We teach girls at a young age how to act so they do not become victims of rape or sexual assault, without explicitly telling them “honey don't walk alone to the bus stop or else you’ll be a victim of sexual assault.” Our society prepares young girls, and young women today for a life of fear.
Rape culture is all too common today, but especially on college campuses. For some people this is a really tough reality to stomach, because we don’t want to believe we live in a world where bad things can happen to innocent people.
Students tend to turn a blind eye to the issue, pretending like the problem doesn't exist on their campus. After all, sometimes it is easier to pretend bad things don't happen than to live with the reality that you're surrounded by them. Your own college is the best college in the world right? So nothing bad ever happens there...
The most important way to bring an end to sexual assault is to start a dialogue, and to stop pretending like the problem doesn't exist your campus.
One student at the University of Alabama has had enough of people turning a blind eye to the problem, and decided to step up and make a difference. President and founder of Not on my Campus, Caroline Builta, started the organization this year, in order to shed light on the situation.
All too often people choose to victim-blame in order to make sense of why sexual assault occurs. “Well, she was asking for it, did you see how she was dressed? She probably regretted the situation and cried rape.”
Victim-blaming is never the option. Not on my Campus is helping to show students that making light of sexual assault cases and situations does more harm than good.
Not on my Campus has recently jump started their “Survivor Series.” This series is where survivors of sexual assault are able to stand up and share their story for others to hear. This selfless and brave act can give so much courage to survivors who are struggling to deal with their situation.
During Survivor Series number one, Builta reveals, "After I was assaulted I left campus because I was scared...I wasn’t scared of being attacked again. I was scared of the student body finding out. We haven’t created a culture on this campus where survivors can feel safe.”
This is something we can all help to change, together. We need to make our survivors feel safe on our campus, safe of judgement and ridicule.
By seeing someone who was in a situation just like them, it helps make the victims not feel as alone, they have people on their side. Keep an eye out for these “Survivor Series” videos once a week, during this six-week series, on their Facebook page.
Sometimes it is hard to know what to say in sensitive situations, especially ones dealing with sexual assault. Builta helps guide our responses by saying, "The only things we should be saying to victims are, I’m sorry, I believe you, and it’s not your fault."
The next time you want to make a rape joke, re-think the idea. Rape and sexual assault aren't funny.
Making little comments like “consent is sexy” isn't either, consent isn't sexy. Many things can be deemed “sexy” like lingerie for instance. Consent is a right that everyone holds, this may be news to some. The next time someone tells you “no,” they aren't playing hard to get.
If you would like to sign the pledge and join the Not on my Campus movement, visit their website.
