I'm 20 years old, and I still live at home. It saves me money and keeps me close to my job, which is willing to make me a flexible schedule so I can balance being a part-time employee and a full-time student taking four classes.
Like any college kid, I want to go out once in a while. I'll want to go to the movies or crash in a friend's dorm. Maybe I'll be staying out later than usual, or maybe I won't be coming home at all. Instead of just not appearing at home or letting myself in at any time I feel like, I message my mom to let her know who I'm with, where I'm going, and when I'll be back, if I do plan on coming home.
If there are multiple stops being made on whatever adventures I'm getting up to, I'll text her and let her know where I am in the course of it and where we'll be heading to next.
I've been criticized plenty of times by both my friends and my mom's. They'll say that I'm acting like a child, telling my mom every step of the way. They've said that she's a control freak for wanting to know where I am and what I'm doing if I'm not at school.
I'll even keep her updated throughout the hour and a half commute from home to school in the morning, letting her know if I've caught my bus or made it to the bus station and so on. Do you know how Lyft has the option to send your ETA to anyone? I'll send my mom every link, even if I'm not headed to wherever she is.
How does me letting my mom know I'm safe make me childish?
In reality, though, my mom doesn't control me. I can't even remember the last time she said no to something I planned on doing, even if it meant skipping class. I've taken trips as simple as staying overnight with a friend and staying in, or as complicated as staying in Boston. She's never so much as complained. My mom just wants to know that I'm safe.
And I want to let my mom know where I am and what I'm up to. It's a safety measure. If I drop off the map and stop answering my phone, she knows who I'm with to reach out to them, when I plan on being back in case I'm just not hearing my phone or it's dead, and where I last was in case I'm actually missing. I'm a young woman, and plenty of terrible things have happened to people like me.
I'm just keeping myself safe and making my mom feel comforted.
