Not All Friendships Have To Die

Not All Friendships Have To Die

I feel so very lucky to have the group of friends that I have.

When you graduated from high school did anyone tell you that you and your friends would drift apart? That it would become very hard for you to maintain those relationships you had with your high school friends. I know I have. I understood very well that growing up means growing apart. Several times in the various relationships I have with my friends. There have been strains but there has also been a lot of strength.

Graduating from high school a lot of us stayed local. But even with staying local we grew apart a bit. Several years later I can look back on these times and see that we all were growing up. We not all of us fully fell off the face of the earth. If one of us did everyone was on top of it. Unless you deliberately do not want to be our friend then we will do everything to make sure you are included.

I feel so very lucky to have the group of friends that I have. I have been friends with some since elementary school, some since middle school, and some since high school. In fact, I am even lucky enough to have my own family included in that circle of people. We don’t need to talk every day but we do our best to hang out as often as we can. It doesn’t need to be anything big. We are pretty simple people. Okay maybe not the case when all of us are together at one, but you get the point.

We all have very different personalities. Sometimes those things do clash but most of the time the opposites do attract. We have come a long way since graduating high school. We are all still figuring out our paths in life. What makes me happy is that our paths have still lead all of us to being together.

Many people have said that they would rather have a few “real” friends than a million acquaintances or “fake” friends. Looking at that statement I genuinely feel that is just another statement that is not at all applicable to my friends. We are as real as it can get. Sure, we all have moments where we aren’t ourselves. With that said we also know when someone is not being their “normal” self. I find it so fascinating that we all can end up on the same page about certain things.

This is just a small testament to the amazing friendships that I have. Whether we talk all the time or talk every so often we have all cared for each other in all stages of growing up. I hope that we can continue these relationships into the rest of our adult years.
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A Letter To My Ex-Best Friend

I wish things had ended differently.


You were my best friend for eleven years. We grew up together, hit milestones together, and did everything together. We helped each other through our parents' divorces, the struggles of high school, mental health breakdowns, and everything else that was thrown at us. Whenever I needed a pick me up, you were the one I went to.

You were a part of my family. You could walk right into my house and no one would even bat an eye. You fought with my brother the way I did and messed with my parents the way I did. You would even text my sister. Most of my family vacations included you. I got into some huge trouble with you, but we also thrived together.

We helped each other choose outfits. I dragged you along to all my dates because I was way too nervous to go alone. We had so many nights of endless laughter over things that really weren't even funny.

You were my person.

But high school changed things. We began to gravitate towards separate friend groups. No more good morning texts, no more venting about the annoying girl in your first period that had a crush on the same boy as you. I stopped hearing about your boy drama.

And one day it stopped completely.

When we saw each other in the hallways, we pretended we didn't. Our memories faded and became just that; memories. We stopped asking each other's lunch plans and making plans with each other in general. We once knew so much about each other we couldn't even tell where one person started and the other ended. But now we're strangers.

And boy, do I miss you.

A lot of people feel bitterness towards their ex-best friends. Angry at the way things ended. I just feel a longing for the way things once were. Yes, our friendship didn't really end in the most civil way. But that doesn't take away from the years of tears, laughter, family vacations, and countless memories we made.

I don't feel angry at you, I just wish we never lost each other.

I think about you a lot. Whenever I see you in passing or on social media, I think about what things may have been like if we never parted ways. I think about how strong our friendship would have been. And it honestly breaks my heart.

I want you to know I have no hard feelings towards you. I know things will never be the same, but I will cherish our memories forever.

Thank you for being such a huge part of my life.

Thank you for not only helping me grow up but growing up alongside me as well.

Thank you for getting me through the tough times, from my parents' divorce to something as simple as a middle school break up.

Thank you for being my person for my entire childhood. You are the reason I'm here today and I will never forget that.

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