Everyone has their own way of arguing whether it's sitting silently or letting damaging words flow. I used to have a short fuse; everything would make me angry. Now, I often find myself not wanting to confront people when something happens. This is the struggle of being non-confrontational.
Let's be real, I have a lot of opinions. Sometimes I talk too much, and sometimes I have a major attitude; however, if someone pisses me off, I don't say anything. I just shut down. Sometimes it's easier to not say anything than to point out the issues. The same thing applies if my feelings are hurt. It can be a terrible cycle where I just wish I could speak up.
Sometimes I do speak my mind, but normally it's not right away. It's not that I don't have the guts, but I need to analyze everything and figure out how to move forward. I'll also consider possible responses.
Most of the time, I don't say anything because I understand the logic behind my feelings. I'm a pretty observant person, so if I'm hurt, I can normally figure out why.
Maybe the person I had a conflict with is going through a lot or is having a bad day. That's perfectly okay. I'll normally just let it go.
Fighting with people takes a lot of energy, and honestly, I usually just don't have it in me to argue. It doesn't mean that I don't want to talk or that I'm still mad. Frankly, I probably have let it go for my well-being. But sometimes, the lack of communication causes tension.
Some days, being non-confrontational sucks. I just wish that I could say how I feel, but I worry about people's feelings too much. I believe that saying something isn't worth upsetting someone else. But it's just because I care. Often, the more I care about you, the less likely I am to fight with you -- unless I know I can get away with it, which is a whole other concept within itself.
So the next time someone doesn't point out that you upset them, don't yell at them for their lack of communication. It's not that they don't want to communicate with you, they probably just accept why you got upset. And sometimes it takes more effort to call someone out than it does to just let it go. In the end, it will all work out, and the issues don't matter too much.
Just because I choose not to communicate every issue I have doesn't mean I don't care. Honestly, it shows that I care more. I respect you enough to not fight over everything. I just hope you can respect my inability to confront you. I hope you don't take advantage of it because I can't help it. Being non-confrontational can be challenging sometimes, but I'm thankful because it causes me to burn fewer bridges.
