If there’s one thing I was very good at during my school years, it was procrastination. Regardless of the size and scope of the project, I would always wait until the last minute to complete a project knowing full well I was teetering along a razor-thin line between success and catastrophe.
Procrastination still follows me around to this day, but it’s something I’d much prefer to shake off, at least in regards to my social life. Twice now, my procrastination has come at a lofty cost, and by that, I mean losing two friends to cancer.
During my early adolescence, I became friends with a pair of siblings and their aunt. The aunt would frequently take us out to eat and despite our age difference, we had a few things in common, namely our love for Madonna’s music.
For as long as she knew me, the aunt would give me a birthday card. When the family moved away, I still received a birthday card every single year, even well into my twenties. I hadn't spoken to her or seen her in years, but I could always count on her card wishing me a happy birthday.
Through family friends, I found out the aunt was diagnosed with colon cancer. Since it had been so long since I had heard from her, I always told myself I needed to write her a letter to say hello, ask how she was doing and thank her for the cards.
Sadly, the aunt succumbed to her cancer…and I never did send the letter. It was too late.
And then there's the story of my former coworker. She and I worked together closely for an entire year, and during that time we became good friends despite her being a decade older than I was. I confided some personal details of my life with her and she was always willing to provide wise, kind advice.
After a year my friend left the job but we kept in touch. I hung out with her once, maybe twice. After becoming friends through social media, she would always ask when we were going to hang out again. She wanted to go on photography sessions together, she wanted to make me a mix CD, she always told me how much love she had for me.
“We'll definitely hang one day,” I told myself. Sadly, my friend was diagnosed with cancer and by then she was too sick to hang.
She passed away earlier this year.
I don't believe in regret, but with my former coworker/friend, I did. The distance was never once an issue and there were countless opportunities to share time with her. There was no excuse. I attended her funeral, but I could not muster up the strength to pay my respects to her husband and see her one last time. I left the funeral with mixed feelings of peace knowing I was there for the funeral but also feeling like a terrible human being for never spending more time with her.
As cliché as it may sound, stop the lollygagging. I always thought I had one more day and then that one more day became too late. Life is unpredictable and who knows if the chance to spend time with someone or tell them you're thinking about them will actually happen.
Wherever these two ladies are, I can only hope that should the day ever come when we see each other again, they will know that I only have wonderful memories of them I cherish deeply. This young man will never forget your kindness and huge hearts.
