I would much rather watch Gran Torino or The Fighter. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't hate The Notebook or A Walk To Remember. I'll order an Angry Orchard over anything but I do love Moscato. You will see me looking like a hot mess more times than you should. I will not tell you how much I like you or really if I even have considered the thought of us together. I understand I am a difficult person. We are the females who take more time and understanding. I promise we are worth it though.
Everyone gets hurt by someone. Maybe you have been hurt a couple times. I learned at 17 that love isn't an easy thing. After that I never truly put myself out there again. This has cost me friendships and relationships. But, I don't get hurt. You see, letting someone hurt you is the worst thing you can do, in my opinion. I have one maybe two friends that share this view. To those who do not, I truly envy you. I wish I could open up to someone and show I would do anything to make them happy. That's just not me though; I cannot.
I show that I care for a guy in a different way. Truly, I relate myself to my guy friends so much. You know I care about you when one or more of these happen:
-I drunk text you.
-I pull away from you and only speak to you when intoxicated.
-I say it's over but you still get that 2am text, snapchat, or phone call.
-I defend you to anyone.
-I deal with you being in and out of my life.
-I ask you questions about you, your life, your family, etc.
-I hook up with you.
-I reply back to you or talk to you sober.
-I actually tell my friends about you.
-I put in effort to make you jealous.
-I don't cringe at the thought of you touching me.
-I look into your eyes or avoid eye contact all together. There's really no in-between here.
-I get awkward when you stare at me.
-I treat you like I treat my guy best friends.
-I do not challenge you to a shot gun.
-I tell you how I really feel.
If I really like you, I tell my guy friends about you.
I am confusing, misleading, hard to understand, and probably wrong in so many ways. But, here is how to deal with 'these girls':
-I really do care for you, let me know you do too.
-Do not, DO NOT lead me on. It will not be pleasant in the end.
-I love competition but not real competition.
-If the L-word comes out of my mouth, it's not a joke. Handle accordingly.
-The longer you drag me along, the worse it gets for you.
-Don't let me get away with anything. I need to know you have a backbone.
-I don't want basic. Stop talking to me about puppies.
-I do listen when you talk about your interests, your dreams, and your ambitions.
-I do pick up on the smallest things.
-Tell me I'm being unfair and what I did wrong.
-Making me mad is a good thing for you.
Look, 'girls like me' are so much more complicated than I could even express. This doesn't even touch half of it. But, that's because when we finally care about someone, it's not something we get over in a few days. I've told myself for over a year not to talk to the same person and it just never works. We are who we are and we can't change that. So, to the guys dealing with 'girls like me' I apologize for the both of us. We know it's not easy and you will never know how much we appreciate and love you. Partly because we suck and can't express anything.
