Despite the fact that the rest of the world seems to be moving in the opposite direction, I have always been staunchly averse to the idea of online dating. “People who use those sites are desperate,” I tell myself. “I’m better than that,” I say. Does this make me a snob? Maybe, but I like to think of myself as old-fashioned.
The idea of meeting “the one” by pressing a couple of buttons on a smartphone just seems so impersonal to me. Call me naïve, but I believe these things should play out like they do in the movies. When I meet the right girl, I want to sweep her off her feet. I want to fall head over heels for her in a “listen to that mixtape she made me even though I despise her taste in music” sort of way. I want to know what true love is like. Whether you agree or not, I feel sites like OkCupid and apps like Tinder simply cannot give me what I want. These sites are built for individuals who thrive on the hook-up culture that has infected our society in recent times. I am not one of those people.
Despite my reluctance to ever sign up for or use an online dating service, I recently decided to download Tinder out of curiosity. So many people I know use the site. I wasn’t planning on walking away from the experience with a date or somebody to hook-up with. Rather, I was simply hoping to learn a thing or two about how it all works, which I feel is important as I have been so quick to judge the app. Here are some of my takeaways from my first experience on Tinder.
A lot of women like to stick their tongues out for no apparent reason.
Seriously, who (besides Miley Cyrus) thinks letting your tongue hang out of your mouth in every photo looks good? You’re not a lizard! Put that thing away.
Tinder makes you feel like a jerk.
As I was using Tinder, I felt a pit in my stomach as I came to a particular realization about this app. In most cases, people don't even take the time to investigate a person's profile before swiping left/denying them. That made me feel horrible. We are literally disregarding a person's existence without knowing anything about them other than the way they look. I can't be alone in thinking there is something wrong with that.
Everyone is embarrassed about using the app.
Countless times while sifting through people’s profiles, I came across bios that included statements like “It’s okay with me if we lie to people about where we met” or “Let’s not tell our future children about this.” See, it’s not just you: everyone is uncomfortable!
Coming across friends on the site is always awkward.
Should I give them a courtesy swipe? Will that be weird? What if I swipe right for them, but they don’t for me? The questions this situation poses are endless!
Needless to say, I was not impressed with this app. Although I have yet to delete it from my phone, I don’t see myself using it much in the future. Maybe this makes me uncool, but I think the old way of doing things is the right way.
