Never Apologize For Walking Away From A Toxic Friendship

Never Apologize For Walking Away From A Toxic Friendship

Sometimes, you have to do whats best for you, and if that's ending that toxic friendship, do it without apology.

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We all have that one friend that we stuck with for far too long, regardless of the way they treated us.

Whether we felt bad for them, or just couldn't get away from them for some reason, we far too often feel obligated to stay attached to those friendships that are nothing but toxic for us.

While I believe that there is always a way to help people, there comes a point where you can't help them any longer, and you must learn to walk away without apology.

For me, this person was someone that would put our friendship on blast to the public and would claim to everyone that I was her best friend. However, behind closed doors that were definitely not the case.

At the end of our friendship, it got to the point that I didn't even want to come home anymore, being that she was my roommate as well.

There were days when I would walk through the door, she would greet me with a hug and a "how was your day?", and there were other days when I would walk into the silent treatment, for no reason whatsoever.

I came to the realization that while we had many amazing moments together, and we had been closed for a very long time, I had to do what was best for me. If that meant removing this person from my life in order to sustain my mental health, then that was what I would do.

For the longest time, however, I went back and forth within my own head, telling myself that maybe I should stick with her because nobody ever did. Was this a sign? probably.

However, it got so bad at the end, that I came to my decision of completely removing her from my life.

That's right. I blocked her on Instagram, Snapchat, everything.

After this detox, I began to see my mental state slowly but surely elevate. While this girl had been my friend since 1st grade and my roommate for 3 years, our friendship time clock was ticking and this was one of the best moves that I could make.

At the end of the day, don't apologize for doing something that sets your mental health as a priority.

While you might have stuck with this friend for a while, there are seasons to life, and she was only meant for that season.

Remember that.

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5 Perks Of Having A Long-Distance Best Friend

The best kind of long-distance relationship.
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Sometimes, people get annoyed when girls refer to multiple people as their "best friend," but they don't understand. We have different types of best friends. There's the going out together best friend, the see each other everyday best friend and the constant, low maintenance best friend.

While I'm lucky enough to have two out of the three at the same school as me, my "low maintenance" best friend goes to college six hours from Baton Rouge.

This type of friend is special because no matter how long you go without talking or seeing each other, you're always insanely close. Even though I miss her daily, having a long-distance best friend has its perks. Here are just a few of them...

1. Getting to see each other is a special event.

Sometimes when you see someone all the time, you take that person and their friendship for granted. When you don't get to see one of your favorite people very often, the times when you're together are truly appreciated.

2. You always have someone to give unbiased advice.

This person knows you best, but they probably don't know the people you're telling them about, so they can give you better advice than anyone else.

3. You always have someone to text and FaceTime.

While there may be hundreds of miles between you, they're also just a phone call away. You know they'll always be there for you even when they can't physically be there.

4. You can plan fun trips to visit each other.

When you can visit each other, you get to meet the people you've heard so much about and experience all the places they love. You get to have your own college experience and, sometimes, theirs, too.

5. You know they will always be a part of your life.

If you can survive going to school in different states, you've both proven that your friendship will last forever. You both care enough to make time for the other in the midst of exams, social events, and homework.

The long-distance best friend is a forever friend. While I wish I could see mine more, I wouldn't trade her for anything.

Cover Image Credit: Just For Laughs-Chicago

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Turning 'I'm Sorry' Into 'Thank You'

A process of self-awareness I think everyone should consider.

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My entire life I've been apologetic.

I use apologies far too often in my daily life. Whether it be to someone holding the door for me even though I'm still ten feet from the door or my interrupting the custodian cleaning my hall's bathroom. From stepping on my friend's toes to bumping into someone in line at Starbucks.

I think as children, we are taught that apologizing for our actions wipes away the consequences from those actions. In past relationships, I have relied on apologies to make myself feel better about how I've made others feel instead of actually using them to improve my actions.

For me, it has just become something ingrained in my personality. I've noticed that it has become a reflex rather than a conscious response. What I've realized recently is that this is something I can change.

Apologies are helpful when mending hurtful or accidental situations, especially when you find yourself in the wrong, but not everything deserves an, "I'm sorry," and using that phrase for every accidental encounter or mistake, in my eyes, lessens its impact.

If we all use, "I'm sorry," for every minor inconvenience we cause, the words become less meaningful.

I have read about this online a lot lately, and it is suggested that instead of apologizing, we should give thanks.

If I'm late for a date with my friends, the old me would've said, "I'm SO sorry, guys!" But the new me will say, "Thank you for waiting for me."

Instead of apologizing to our (wonderful) custodians, I'll say, "Thank you so much for the work you do here every day."

If someone is kind enough to hold the door for me, even though I'm nowhere near it, I won't apologize for inconveniencing them. Instead, I will take the time to appreciate the fact that they were kind enough to do so, despite my distance from the door.

I think that this is a process everyone can benefit from, so long as they are willing to be conscious of their thoughts and the words they speak. By replacing, "I'm sorry," with an expression of gratitude, we can develop a more positive mindset and reserve apologies for situations that deserve them.

We can also use those rare apologies to remind us to improve our actions; if we hurt someone, we don't get to decide that we didn't or invalidate their feelings. We can then meaningfully apologize and allow it to inherently change our behavior.


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