*Sitting on my rear end, binging Netflix while the kids are napping* My husband walks in the room and says "Hey, when you get a free minute, can you do the dishes and I will put them away?". Right off the bat, steam comes from my ears and I come back with "Yeah, sure. Anything else I can do for you during my free time?". He responds with "I had said when you're free. Like when you're done doing whatever you're doing. I wasn't rushing you". Sound familiar? He didn't have a tone with me, nor was he demanding I do it right that second yet, I assumed he had this underlying message or tone that he was giving me for getting to enjoy some alone time. The fact is, the dishes needed to be done and he simply asked for help with them. Had this whole interaction been reversed, I would have been so offended that he was getting an attitude with me for just asking for help. haha

I am the world's worst selective listener. My husband will often say "You didn't even hear what I said", mainly because I'll reply with a sassy tone due to not hearing what was actually being told to me. I'm not trying to be rude and inconsiderate by not fully listening, but that is exactly what it is, rude and inconsiderate. I know that when I am trying to tell someone something and they're either on their phone or they have a blank stare on their face, my feelings get hurt a little. On the other hand though, I have done the same thing. I think it's safe to say that I can be a hypocrite. I think the Golden Rule "So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them..."~Matthew 7:12, is so fitting here. I feel that this is a good example of a moral ground everyone should have, no matter what religion you are, or spiritual you follow (or don't follow). We want to be heard, but we need to remember to hear others, and not just hear them, but understand them. Had I taken the time to look at my husband instead of the t.v and really listen to him ask me for help with the dishes, I probably would not of gotten the attitude that I did.

A dear friend of mine shared a quote to social media that said "Whatever anyone says or does, assume positive intent. You will be amazed at how your whole approach to a person or problem becomes very different" ~ Indra Nooyi. Let it be known though, abuse of any kind is an exception to this. Think of all the times you or someone you know have gotten upset unnecessarily due to someone's "tone". Now think of how much better that conversation or interaction would have gone had we taken the time to not only listen, but understand them in a positive light. There are great examples on Google of "Positive Tone Words" that replace others to avoid coming across with a negative tone. I am far from perfect. I need to work on all of this a great deal, but I know that I am not alone. Remember, we can all choose to be more positive humans. It just takes some compassion, empathy and love towards ourselves and others.

~The Truthful Mama