In a college full of bullies, insane teachers, and gross school lunches... I'm trying to do the impossible and create a college survival guide to help you make it out alive.

1. Bedtime isn't really a thing, but make it a thing.

You might as well forget the idea of going to bed early, because chances are it's not going to happen. Whether it's studying for a test, flirting with the cute guy in your hall, or just enjoying Netflix in your room... just accept it. Sleeping just isn't your top priority anymore. Try to force yourself to go to bed early... everyone in your 8am will thank you.

2. Crappy boys do exist, and you're the bait.

Just like high school, there will always be cute boys who are up to no good. You just gotta weed through some of the bad ones to get to the good. Just because they are in college doesn't mean they're more mature; remember this.

3. Say no to Taco Bell at 2 a.m., your love handles will thank you later.

It can take a tremendous amount of self-discipline to say no to that crunch wrap supreme, but your body will thank you the next day. I promise. Not only will you feel better, but you'll look better. Not getting enough sleep and eating fatty foods can drain your body completely.

4. "Have you gained weight? You're looking a little pudgy." - Mom

You have two tests this week, three papers due, and a presentation to do. GO TO THE GYM. Not only will it help you lose that freshman 15, but you'll release endorphins (which make you happy and less stressed). Take a 30-minute study break and go for a run. If you make it a priority... it will happen.

5. Your roommate might not end up being your best friend, and that's ok.

Chances are you won't even be in your room that often. You'll be crazy busy and won't even have the time to deal with your roommates craziness. Invest in some headphones and learn to block them out while you're home. And try not to kill them.

6. You will learn the importance of dry shampoo.

I promise you this will be one of the best investments you will ever make. Didn't shower last night because you were up late writing a paper? Dry Shampoo. Didn't shower last night because "New Girl" is taking over your life? Dry Shampoo. Just want to look like Beyonce? Dry Shampoo.

7. Regardless of what high school teachers told you about college, it really isn't as bad as they made it seem.

High school teachers tend to exaggerate the truth when it comes to talking about college professors. Believe it or not, college professors are there to help you, not destroy your life. If you act interested in them, they will be interested in you. A good relationship with your professors is always a good thing.

8. Never forget about your best friend who has been there for you through thick and thin: Coffee.

We've all had those mornings where we just can't seem to wake up, and those sleepless nights at the library where we can't keep our eyes from shutting. All you have to do is drink some coffee and you're golden. So shoutout to coffee for always being there on our worst days, and loving us on our best.

9. You'll be graced with the art of carpooling.

If I've learned anything in college, it's that a five person car can actually fit nine people. If you're not in the mood to be crammed, make sure you offer to drive.

10. You'll learn how to hide the fact you're winded after taking the stairs.

It's pretty embarrassing walking into a classroom full of people and noticeably being out of breath. If you have to, take the stairs at a slower pace. Also, take breaks at every floor. Maybe hit the gym too.

11. Your phone call home can fix it.

There's nothing like talking to your family after a long day. Your family tells you the truth, and helps you pull yourself together. It's always nice having someone put you back on track. All in all, never forget the ones that love you and can fix 99% of the problems college is going to hand you.