So my roommates got arrested for allegedly robbing our neighbor's house. Everyone has been blowing up my phone. Stop that. So this is an interview with myself, asking all the questions that I won't stop getting asked.
1. Why did they do it?!?
Okay, stop asking me this. Innocent until proven guilty, people. I have no idea why they would allegedly do this. Cash was tight in our house and that's really the only reason I can think of. However, I am just the roommate. I don't have a one way ticket inside their brains. If I did, I still wouldn't go there. Most of you guys have met at least one of them, would you want to be inside Tyler's brain? Didn't think so.
2. How much time are they getting?
I DON'T KNOW IF THEY'LL GET ANY TIME, I'M NOT A LAWYER OR A JUDGE OR A JURY. STOP ASKING ME. WAIT FOR THEIR COURT DATE. K thanks.
3. Have they been calling you from jail?
No. And if they were, I still probably wouldn't tell you what they said to me.
4. But you said you're not friends with Tyler anymore, so why not tell us what he said?
Because I'm not a bitch? And it's none of your business. No, I'm not friends with Tyler anymore, but that happened months ago and again, is between me and Tyler. Are you me or Tyler? No, or you wouldn't be asking these questions.
5. Who was the other guy?
That's Jawon. He was staying with us. He was not actually our roommate, despite what all the articles say. He needed a place to crash for a little bit and we've known him for years, so we let him crash. He's always been super nice and I've never known him to do anything like what they are accusing him of. The end.
6. Aren't you mad they would put you in this situation?
Yes. Duh. Now I have to take the garbage out by myself, have no one to argue with about doing the dishes, and no one to blame when the toilet paper roll isn't replaced.
7. Are you gonna apologize to your neighbors? The whole neighborhood probably hates you.
Yeah, some of them have made it very clear that they now hate me or at least, they're avoiding me like the plague and glare at me every chance they get. One of them even ignored me saying good morning the other day. Like made eye contact, glared and kept walking without saying a word... okay... bitch. But the neighbors, who actually got their house robbed I really am sorry that happened to you and I know it probably doesn't mean much, but if there is anything I can do, I hope you'll let me know.
8. You had to have seen this coming, right?
If I saw this coming, why the hell would I be living with them? Remember, there are no stupid questions, just stupid people. Like you, for asking that question.
9. Did the cops tear your place apart looking for evidence?
No, they were super respectful and very careful not to break anything or make a mess. Believe it or not, most cops are pretty respectful, even if they think someone is guilty of something. If you're nice to them, they'll be nice to you (most of the time. Let's not start a debate on that one, okay?)
10. Are you gonna like sell Tyler's stuff for rent money?
Totally. Yup. $1 for everything. Going on Craigslist tonight. Look for it... Seriously? No. Stop it.
I was in no way prepared for anything like this. I had to put a vacation on pause.The cops in Lisle now know me pretty well (although, that may not be a bad thing). I'm basically glared at every time I leave my apartment and I'm just trying to pretend everything is normal. But it's not. I can't even look at Facebook or my phone without someone questioning me. I can only imagine what their families are going through. I know no one is going to stop talking about it probably until the trial is over, so please, do me a favor and keep in mind that while they may not be your favorite people, they are someone's kid, someone's brother, someone's friend. And try to remember that everyone is innocent until proven guilty. This article, while supposed to get people off my case, was also supposed to be a little funny. I hope you enjoyed it. And if you seriously want to talk to me about what's going on and want to know if I'm okay, bring over a case of beer and some tacos and come have an actual conversation with me. If you just want to gossip, don't call me. I'm not your friend. I don't want to talk to you about it. Thanks.
