When you're little, people say that you can be whatever you want when you grow up. They say that you can do anything you set your mind to. I am here to tell you that that is a lie. You can not be anything you want when you grow up. When people say that, they mean that you can be a doctor, or an astronaut, or a scuba diver or even part of a circus act. You cannot, however, be a mermaid when you grow up. Try as I might, this is one dream that will never come true.

First of all, I want to talk about the irony of this dream of mine. The first time my dad took me to a swim lesson, I screamed so much when they tried to put my head under the water that he didn't want to take me back. These days, I would live my entire life underwater if I could, but I can't. Because the greatest tragedy of my existence is that I am not half fish. The other irony is that I can't sing, and as people know mermaids are supposed to be the great sirens of the sea. But you know what, it's fine. I'm not bitter that I don't have a tail.

Alright fine. Clearly I'm a little bitter or I wouldn't be writing this. I'm salty as the sea, if you will. But life goes on. I am not a mermaid. I will never be a mermaid, so instead I do what I can to feel like a mermaid, like dying my hair purple and buying one of those delightful mermaid tail blankets. Oh, yeah, and I'm going to college by the beach; that helps, too.

Being a mermaid has its obvious attractions; you get to spend your days underwater, you can be friends with fish, you can probably find not only Nemo, but Dory, too. And best of all, you're as free as the waves.

Mermaids are fun. I don't know what Ariel was thinking, wanting to leave all that behind. I wish I could be part of that world. I'd like to be in an octopus' garden. I don't want to live on a yellow submarine, I do want to be under the sea. I'm sorry you guys, I couldn't just use a little mermaid joke. Had to have the Beatles in there. They were wise people.

Not being a mermaid has always been hard for me. I'm a fish out of water, if you will. OK, fine -- so I'm not, but that doesn't make me want to be a mermaid any less. I want to spend my days in or by the water, away from all of the chaos of life and surrounded by the peace of the waves. I want to explore the world without having to pay for expensive plane tickets and I definitely want to find the lost city of Atlantis.

Being a mermaid is one of those childish whims that I hope I always hold on to, particularly as I begin school and learn to handle the stresses of college, careers and everything that goes with it. I hope that I still have those little fantasies to return to in my mind when everything seems so serious and my life is just not going where I want it to or when I'm just not getting where I want to be fast enough.

When you're a kid, people tell you that you can be anything you want. They tell you that you can accomplish anything you want when you set your mind to it. The truth is this: You can't be whoever you want in real life, but you should never lose the ability to lose yourself in whimsical fantasy worlds when you need an escape from reality because everyone does, sometimes. Needing to escape shouldn't be something to be ashamed of. Imagination is delightful in that it allows us to lose ourselves to another life without completely losing touch with reality. Never let the phrase, "grow up," mean, "stop dreaming." There's my cheesy little two cents for the day.