A Thank You To My Grandfather For Teaching Me These 10 Things

A Thank You To My Grandfather For Teaching Me These 10 Things

My grandfather has been gone for a few months, but his impact on me will last a lifetime.


I'm going against my philosophy of keeping my deep personal life off of social media for this piece. My words can hardly do him any justice, but I'll try. My grandfather passed away in the early hours of November 1, 2018. He was 85. I miss him every day. Here's to his lessons that I'll never forget.

1. He taught me how to be funny.

I've never encountered an individual so cunning, quick-witted, and readily available to make a joke in any situation. If you looked up the term "ball buster" in the dictionary, I'm confident his picture would be next to it. This trait is at the top of my list because I value it the strongest. He taught me that humor made everybody's lives a little less sad, and that putting a smile on someone's face could make all of the difference. For this, I take pride in being known as a comedian.

2. He taught me how to love, respect, and cherish a woman.

In their 41 years together, I don't think that he stopped looking at my grandmother for a single moment. They were inseparable. There was nothing that he wouldn't do for her, and went to the lengths of the world to make her happy. By no means were they perfect, like any relationship or marriage is. But I'll be damned if they weren't the closest thing to it.

3. He taught me how to be a man.

Through his actions, he showed me that a real man finishes his business without complaints. He acted as a father figure to me, regardless of his extended family and a billion grandchildren to pay attention to. Somehow, he always kept up with his multiple responsibilities and thrived when he was depended on.

4. He taught me how to be financially responsible.

Through our conversations, he always told me to keep my head down and work hard to pay bills and expenses. On the other hand, he reminded me to go out, have a life, and make memories with my money. I'm prideful about my advanced awareness of money and the value of a dollar, and that's largely due to him.

5. He taught me that you choose your family.

This doesn't only refer to nuclear family, but anyone that crosses your path that plays a much larger role in your life. I wasn't related to my grandfather by blood. He married my grandmother when my mother was young. That didn't mean a thing to me, because he was always there to support me and kick me in the ass when I needed either or. Because of him, I have a very different perspective on what constitutes family.

6. He taught me optimism.

Coming from a man who sustained multiple heart attacks and was plagued by health for decades prior to his death, I've never witnessed an individual who was so satisfied just to be alive. After 85 years of living, 30+ of them in and out of hospitals, ambulances, and emergency rooms, I would be the poster child for all things miserable and pessimistic. His signature catchphrase was "I've had some bad days, but never a bad life." I strive to wake up and dominate the day, every day, just like he would.

7. He taught me how to love food.

My grandfather boasted a powerful reputation for hiding snacks around the house, in vehicles, in public places, etc. Like me, he was stubborn and loved salts, sweets, and essentially anything that the human body can consume. He wasn't afraid to push buttons and treat himself to ice cream before dinner or late-night Wawa soft pretzels. Even though I'm a picky eater (and vastly improving, thank you), he was, undoubtedly, my snack-time companion.

8. He taught me how to be patriotic.

He served in the American Navy from 1951 to 1955. He might have told me the same exact stories about life on the waters to everyone he knew countless times, but it was obvious that he adored his country and didn't regret serving. His role in the Navy and interesting recollections partially contributed to my interest and eventual love of history and the military. Fast forward to now, I'll be graduating with a Bachelor's degree in History in May.

9. He taught me drive and determination.

Careers, girlfriends, apartments, luxuries. My grandfather told me that if I wanted something bad enough, it was practically mine as long as I aggressively pursued it. Thanks to him, I'm never satisfied with "average" and consistently push myself to be that much better the next day.

10. He taught me faith.

He was a devout Catholic and never missed time in church. I stay as far away from religion as humanly possible. Our difference here doesn't matter. Because he taught me to believe in something, whether it be God, yourself, goals and aspirations, whatever the case may be. He showed me that if you believe in something avidly enough, you create something to work towards.

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The Benefits​ Of Argon Oil Prove That Essential Oils Truly Are A Miracle Cure

Get great skin, great hair, and great nails.


Essential oils work wonders in beauty. They can be used as moisturizers, help your hair grow, or even thicken your lashes.

Throughout my life, I've had everyone talk about how amazing coconut oil is as a moisturizer and for hair care. But everyone has different skin types and what works for one person may not for others. I've religiously used coconut oil to condition and care for my hair but whenever I put it on my face, it clogs my pores and makes me break out. My extremely dry skin made me go on a hunt to find an oil that would really help me keep my skin hydrated and supple.

An amazing oil is argon oil. It is high in fatty acids and vitamin E which help your skin to hold moisturize for a longer time. I use it right after my shower and put on a thin moisturizer followed by argon oil. The effects of store-bought moisturizer are good but quick to fade so the oil on top really helps lock that moisture in. And doing these steps right after a shower is really great because the hot water opens up your pores so that your skin can really soak in the benefits of the products you put on it.

Argon oil is great for the skin also because it doesn't clog your pores as coconut oil does. It helps prevent wrinkles and keeps your skin healthy without feeling sticky or greasy.

You can also mix some argon oil in with coconut oil and use this mixture to massage your scalp to help circulate blood and promote hair growth. Applying it through the length of your hair works as a great conditioner for soft and silky hair. I prefer to warm this mixture to melt the coconut oil and separate my hair into small sections, massaging the oil mixture into each section. I also like to soak the ends of my hair in the little oil that remains after you apply the oil through your scalp. It helps to soften the rough and damaged ends.

I get hangnails a lot because my skin is just really dry all the time. I massage in a drop of argon oil onto each cuticle to help keep them moisturized and healthy.

Argon oil also works as a great highlighter base, as well. Because it doesn't clog the skin and still adds glow, I like to rub in some argon oil to the tops of my cheeks and the bridge and tip of my nose and chin before going over it with a powder highlighter. This really works to amplify the glow of the highlighter.

And if you want to keep it really natural, just pop on some concealer and rub just the oil into the highest parts of your face. You will truly look like you are glowing from within!

Taking good care of your skin and hair early on will help you retain your beauty for a longer period of time. It is also soothing and therapeutic to take care of yourselves because we often neglect ourselves in our busy day to day lives.


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Outgrowing Friendships Is A Necessary Part Of Life


Why do friendships naturally begin to gravitate away from each other? Why is there an emptiness within the bond that used to be filled with excessive passion? Why does effort suddenly disappear? Why do we lose the pieces that once kept us together?

It is a great challenge for me to look at people who were once the reasons behind my heart being so consumed in love, without tears filling my eyes to the point of exhaustion simply thinking of the friendship we used to possess. There are many moments I cannot understand why, when, and how we ended up going in different directions without the guidance we once craved and needed from each other. It seems impossible to release the specialness we shared. I cannot fathom the fact that we have been walking in parallel routes without even a glimpse of each other. I wonder if there's anything I could have improved upon to save us. Or were we not meant to be rescued?

Appreciate that you are engaging in internal growth, even if it is at the cost of separation from those you love deeply.

The timelines of our lives do not always match with those around us. Sometimes as we fall into the pits of despair, our friends find inescapable love. Sometimes as our friends grieve burdensome pains, we begin to visualize ourselves in a new light. As our pathways begin to part due to our progressions and setbacks occurring at diverse times, we fail to acknowledge the extents of our personal developments because we are too invested in analyzing a friendship that was not meant to last. When we lose such friendships we take our strengths for granted. We fail to think of the person we have become throughout the course of these attachments.

You have changed in beautiful ways and you should shy away from seeking to be the person you used to be for the sake of holding onto old friendships. You are experiencing a difference within yourself, and not everyone will understand such a difference, nor will their own differences connect with yours like they once have.

Do not overthink distanced friendships or it will lead you to endless self-doubt and unneeded frustration.

We drive ourselves insane by shifting such blame upon ourselves when we are left on an empty road full of questions. What could I have done to create such a disconnect within this friendship? Did I say something so exceedingly wrong to cause this hurtful shift? Did I bother this person with an unintentional act of thoughtlessness? Could I have been a greater friend? When we question, we doubt ourselves in ways we do not deserve. Recognition is needed to conquer the unsettling thought that there is not always a causation behind a drifting of individuals. Push yourself to stop searching for something that does not exist. You will find yourself on a path of creating the oddest explanations to help justify such a separation, when you should acknowledge that some questions do not have answers.

As you contemplate if the connection still remains, acknowledge that the underlying meaning of this contemplation means that the bond has disappeared. As life changes, people change, and as people change, their most valued friendships come to a close due to the similarities fading. Although this is a saddening concept to grasp, it is one that everyone should be prepared to experience. Sometimes there is no reason behind a dying connection aside from the interruptions life brings. We wrongly search for an exact understanding of why specific friendships do not feel as exciting or as effort-filled as they once were. But rather, we must seek to appreciate a friendship for all that it has consisted of, and learn to be OK with the fact that some relationships are not designed to be repaired when all that is left to discuss is the past versions of ourselves.

Some bonds are meant to be broken in order to find ourselves.

This brokenness is the price we pay for pursuing our journeys truthfully. When we come closer to a peace of mind and firm comprehension of who we are destined to be, we lose people who once meant the world to us because our visions, purposes, and values do not correlate. BE WILLING TO LET GO OF FRIENDSHIPS THAT ARE PREVENTING YOU FROM FINDING YOUR TRUE SELF, EVEN IF THE LOVE AND CARE IS STILL VERY PRESENT. DO NOT ALLOW DISTRACTIONS FROM ALL THAT LIES AHEAD OF YOU. JUST AS THERE IS BEAUTY AND LOVE IN HOLDING ON, THERE IS JUST AS MUCH BEAUTY AND LOVE IN LETTING GO. DO NOT FEAR AN UNCOMFORTABLE FUTURE WITHOUT PEOPLE BY YOUR SIDE WHO YOU FEEL YOU NEED, FEAR ONE THAT WITHHOLDS YOU FROM GROWING! Sometimes we must let go of others in order to hold onto ourselves.

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