I have come from a robust and boisterous family. There is never a dull moment in the house, and no one can get a sense of peace and quiet. When I wake up in the morning, I hear the clattering of dishes and the screaming coffee machine.
Throughout the day, someone is always exclaiming an interesting thought or they are in a deep conversation with someone about some idea they absolutely need to express. We argue fiercely over our differing opinions on a daily basis.
Being a young adult, I have grown a strong sense of independence. After going home for break during college, I always feel as though I need to prove to my family that I have changed in some way. I feel the need to bring something to the table as you might say.
After several months of not seeing my family, I have found out how much of a short fuse I have with them. I have wished that they would clean up the house more, I have wished them to praise me more and I have wished that they were different.
To my disappointment, I have felt that I have not changed at all ever since I left for college and that no matter how hard I try, I fail to see them in a different light.
Despite how annoyed or embarrassed I am with my family, I cannot change the fact that they are the way they are. One of the hardest lessons in life is that you cannot change people. I live up to ideals and become very disappointed and frustrated later on.
Essentially, I give up and learn to accept the way things are; it's not worth the time nor energy to get worked up about something that has always inevitably been there. It is my own problem if I have an issue with someone's personality or behavior. If anything, it is my own behavior that I have to change.
Most importantly, just because I understand my family and their quirks so well, that does not mean that I should not give them the respect that they deserve. It is simply wrong to treat my friends with a higher respect before my family, that would make me into a horrible person, and certainly someone that would be untrustworthy and unkind. It can be easy to forget on how I behave around my family, and if I keep acting in a bad way, it is bound to show up and unintentionally be expressed to my friends.
My family deserves my love and respect. I cannot change them. Sure, I can bicker with them and argue, and have a hard time tolerating them. From time to time, communication is needed to talk things out and all is good with the world again. Building and maintaining a healthy relationship with my family not only makes me feel at peace with my friends but also with myself.
