It is nearly impossible to watch a show or movie from the early 2000’s in which teenage girls aren’t having some crisis that they must write about in their diary. Throughout my later years of elementary and middle school I made various attempts to keep a diary like the teens that I watched on TV, none of these attempts were successful. When I come across these diaries today I usually don’t have more than two entries to read. Had I known then what I know now about the various physical and mental health benefits journaling carries maybe I would’ve kept with it.
During the fall my English professor required us to keep a journal throughout the semester. Encouraging us to write in it everyday. We even learned about the various benefits that keeping a journal can have. Studying different artists and authors that have kept journals throughout their lives and even looking more on the scientific end of it to experiments that have been conducted.
I have experienced the control and organization that keeping a journal provides first hand. Journals can provide one with the ability to hone and have control over the days in one's life. Journaling throughout my first semester had helped me make sense of things that have happened and eased some of my nerves. Right from the very start of my journey in exploring the art of journaling I began to feel very positive emotions. The first time I journaled, I already felt a calming presence. There was something about unwrapping my new journal and opening the front cover up for the first time that gave me such encouragement. I stared at it laying in front of me, a beautiful sight. Lines not yet corrupted, pages not yet turned, there was so much opportunity ahead of me. I wondered what I would make of these pages, or better yet, what these pages would make of me.
I quickly began to recap a few significant moments from my day, the dark ink gliding over the eggshell white paper, a marvelous sight. This entry was more than just me recounting my daily events, I was able to include emotion, express things the way I saw them. I was able to open up and become vulnerable to the pages before me, because there is a high degree of comfort in the fact that a journal can’t talk back. My thoughts and emotions no longer on house arrest in my head under society’s orders. I wrote what I knew, what I felt, and what I wanted to. I wasn’t influenced by, or writing for, an outside source, it was raw and it was real. Being able to express myself in such a way felt similar to the way I felt when I first got contacts for my eyes. I was seeing the world clearer than I had before. The journaling only became better. I slowly was able to feel even more comfortable with expressing myself, though I didn’t think it was possible. It didn’t take long to learn how to read what I was writing and sort through my emotions, and make sense of how I actually felt, as opposed to how I convinced myself I felt.
During my brief time journaling I had experienced a reduction of my daily stress and was able to go through the day with a clear mind, as opposed to the chaotic thoughts that are usually bottled up and clouding my judgment and perspective. Being able to have a personal experience of what it means to actually keep a journal has allowed me to be more open and understanding to the ideas of influential people who urge others to keep journals. It is great that today I can look back and recall exactly what I was feeling during even my first weeks as a college student.
