Love yourself for the naturally stunning person that you are, right? Easier said than done, as I am sure most of you can relate to. We try to love ourselves, but there is always something — a flaw — that we see in ourselves that we cannot let it go of until it is somehow “fixed” and put back within the “boundaries of society.” If it is not one thing, it’s another.

In our world, we are constantly being bombarded with people telling us that we need to embrace ourselves for who we are. However, this uplifting quote is counteracted by the mass influx of what is considered outward “beauty” in the media, which is what we have come to believe is what really counts in life.

Me? I can’t say that I love my natural self. Sure, I can say that I have nice qualities. I could say that I do love who I am as a person, on the inside. However, the media puts the spotlight on the outer person, and this, my friends, is where my struggle begins.

I started getting acne when I was in seventh grade. I still deal with it now, probably in an even more severe way than when I had it during the dark days of middle school. With the constant reminder from the media that beautiful girls aren’t “supposed” to have acne, that they are meant to have flawlessly clear skin, you could say that this is an area of my life that I am not happy with. It’s always the girls with the effortlessly smooth complexions who get the guys in the end, am I correct? And that issue is just another piece of the puzzle. With this image constantly taking over my life, I have come to believe that I will never find someone to spend the rest of my life with because I simply do not have the gift of “natural beauty."

So how am I supposed to attract a member of the opposite gender? I look at the girls around me and constantly compare myself to them. They can roll out of bed, put on some clothes and be ready for the day. However, I can’t walk out of the door and feel confident without first putting makeup on, and that’s just how it is. I am so very jealous of the girls who don’t have to wear makeup because they have naturally clear skin, who don’t have to touch up their makeup a few times a day because their skin has decided to like them. I can’t attribute my acne to laziness either because I have tried every route possible to get rid of it, and yet it persists, while some girls barely wash their faces and don’t have a single blemish, which I find unfair.

However, I have come to realize within the past few months that my outer beauty (or lack thereof) does not define who I am. The person who loves me will not be focused on how I look on the outside. Of course, first impressions are very real, but a “beautiful face” (whatever that entails) will not be enough to form a lasting relationship.

I have also realized that my “beauty” cannot be put in the hands of others. The reason why I have never felt pretty enough is because I take the opinions of others above my own. I always believe that they will not think that I am beautiful, but in reality, the only person’s opinion on my looks that matters is my own.

Through this realization, I have grown in my self-confidence. I have been able to look at myself in the mirror, without makeup, and tell myself that I am beautiful, something that I was never really able to do before. I can’t say that I am confident enough to walk around without makeup at this point, but I can at least leave my room with uplifted spirits because I believe that I look good enough for myself, and that is all that matters.

So whatever issue that you are dealing with, realize that you are enough and that you are beautiful the way that you are. Period. Embrace your flaws, and realize that they are what make you human. You don’t have to look like a model to find your place in the world. Battle through the insecurities, and be courageous in everything that you do.