Everything was perfect. It was all too perfect. Our beliefs and values were the same because I thought I had to follow everything you believed in. You wanted our relationship to be perceived as "flawless." But as the days passed, I noticed our paths no longer crossed and the love we had for each other diminished. I thought you presented me with unconditional love, but unconditional love is never decreased or taken away.

Or is it?

You taught me that even something so innocent and precious can be ripped away in seconds.

And let me say this very clear: I will never forgive you for that.

I remember the constant fighting, I remember the heartwrenching sound of your silence, I remember the quiet tears running down my face as I begged you to reconsider what you were doing. But most of all, I remember the feeling of my heart aching after I realized the "perfect" perception I had of you was merely an act. The love you presented was all an act.

I remember seeing the wonderful image of you diminish in front of my very eyes and mold into a monster. How everything I knew about you was false, yet you shaped unconditional love for me for the rest of my life. How dare you mold such a beautiful concept into a painful one.

You left emotionally and transformed into someone I no longer recognize.

You left mentally and took a piece of me with you.

You left physically and your absence stung as it filled the cracks you created.

I asked, cried, screamed for you to understand what you were doing to me and all you needed to do was reassure me you were going to stop. Why couldn't you make the "perfect" image I had of you real and love me as you once did? You forced me to break down and question every other relationship I had. The one man in my life who I thought would continuously comfort and support me in everything I did suddenly stopped... you stopped because I changed.

The love you once had for me changed because I grew up.

I remember asking myself "if I hadn't shaped into the woman I am today, would you treat me differently?"

You stopped supporting my choices. You argued with my thoughts and made me feel vulnerable and unable to talk to you. You pushed my feelings aside and stopped understanding what I needed. You made me question everything I believed in. I asked myself, "is this what unconditional love is?"

I am not what you imagined me to become. I am certainly not what you signed up for, and I know I will never fulfill your "perfect" but fake picture. I am not sorry and I will never apologize for who I have become. I changed and you continued to distance yourself because I am not the woman you imagined. Is unconditional love meant to change?

After every relationship or fling I encounter, I hurt for a while but then your heartbreak overpowers the sting these men leave me with. I am sick of feeling the pain. I am tired of feeling insecure about speaking my truth because I still care what you think.

Why do I still care? Why do you hold a power over me that no one else does? How can I overcome someone who left me with an image I can never erase?

I am frightened to love again.

I am afraid I will use your standard of unconditional love to compare against my other relationships. I am terrified that the next person I one day trust my heart and soul with may follow the path you led me through blindly. I trusted you with these two items, and you shattered them in the blink of an eye.

You shattered me. Let that word resonate in your mind.

Is unconditional love meant to make you feel worthless at some point?

Your love was meant to stay forever. You were meant to protect me from the hardships in life and hold my hand through it all. Nothing will be as painful as the moment I learned the truth about your definition of unconditional love. The memory of you taking away everything I needed will forever burn in my mind.

You make every heartbreak easier because I never healed from yours.

Let these words shape the perception you have of yourself. Do you see the monster I see, or am I still a disappointment in your eyes?