I'm 18 Years Old And I Still Sleep With My Baby Blanket

I'm 18 Years Old And I Still Sleep With My Baby Blanket

I don't plan on stopping anytime soon.


Before I was born, my great-grandmother made a baby blanket for my older sister, but she never took to it. I, however, did take to it. I named it my 'nummy', and don't ask me why because I'm not entirely sure where it came from.

It became my source of comfort; I couldn't sleep without her, play without her, or stay overnight absolutely anywhere without it snuggled up to my body. I sometimes wonder what I would've found comfort in if my sister would have been attached to the blanket when I first came along.

There came a point, around middle school, that I felt childish for still feeling the need to sleep with my baby blanket. I had long stopped taking it to sleepovers, mainly because it was too worn out and torn up for me to want to risk ruining it more. But, I mostly just felt embarrassed about still finding comfort in something so childish, I didn't know anybody else who did in my new school, so why should I? I find it funny now that I cared so much, about what other people would think, and so instead of simply not telling anybody, I just tried to force myself to stop needing it.

So, I tucked it in a drawer and every time I would try to go to sleep, I would miss the feeling of comfort it brought me. It worked for a while, but still on nights when I couldn't fall asleep because I was stressed out or upset, I would pull it out of a drawer and hold on to it while I cried. And then next morning, I'd wake up with it next to my head feeling safe, but as I started to get ready for the day, back into the drawer it went, and with it all the comfort of forgetting my troubles.

The summer before my sophomore year of high school, there was one night I had to go to the hospital with chest pains. I was terrified. After coming home late that night, or early that morning I suppose, all I wanted was to curl up with my nummy and feel safe again, and that's exactly what I did. I'm not sure if it was the extreme sense of fear or the pain, I was feeling that made me realize I was dumb for ever thinking that I had to sleep without it. I've slept with it almost every night since then, with the exception of sleepovers, because I'm still too afraid that it'll tear more.

Now, I'm a freshman in college and I still sleep with it every night. It isn't something I'm embarrassed by, because who doesn't need a little piece of comfort or their childhood in their life? I also realized, after talking about it with people, or them finding it in my room, that it's so incredibly normal! As much as I think people hate to admit it growing up, there are always going to be parts of us or things from our past that we will still hold on to, no matter how minuscule or large those things are. My nummy is everything my childhood wrapped up into one torn up, worn out, hanging on by a thread, piece of cloth that I don't plan on letting go of anytime soon.

Popular Right Now

10 Shows Netflix Should Have Acquired INSTEAD of Re-newing 'Friends' For $100 Million

Could $100 Million BE anymore of an overspend?


Netflix broke everyone's heart and then stitched them back together within a matter of 12 hours the other day.

How does one do that you may wonder. Well they start by announcing that as of January 1st, 2019 'Friends' will no longer be available to stream. This then caused an uproar from the ones who watch 'Friends' at least once a day, myself including. Because of this giant up roar, with some threats to leave Netflix all together, they announced that 'Friends' will still be available for all of 2019. So after they renewed our hope in life, they released that it cost them $100 million.

$100 million is a lot of money, money that could be spent on variety of different shows.

1. Sorry, there aren't any

2. Sorry, there aren't any

3. Sorry, there aren't any

4. Sorry, there aren't any

5. Sorry, there aren't any

6. Sorry, there aren't any

7. Sorry, there aren't any

8. Sorry, there aren't any

9. Sorry, there aren't any

10. Sorry, there aren't any

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

How Can We Be More Clutch?

Look back on past events in your life where you were resilient, where you did succeed in high pressure and high stakes situations. What did you do then? What can you learn from it now?


Each of us, deep in our souls, has the gift of clutch. Look no further than the last time you had a paper due in less than an hour with more than two pages to write, and you were able to finish the paper (surely with phenomenal outcomes). That's what you were in that moment: clutch. Clutch as an adjective is defined as being "dependable in critical situations."

Jeff Wise, the author of Extreme Fear , a book about performance in moments of high pressure and danger, said that "there's no question that when pressure is intense, skilled performance are able to tap abilities that are otherwise kept in reserve." I'm sure myself and many of my peers, with final exams and papers on the near horizon, would like to tap into our deep-seated reserves of clutch to lift our grades.

Some believe that the idea of being clutch is a myth, that it is just a statistical anomaly that perhaps we notice it more when people succeed seemingly impossibly in high-pressure situations. According to Wise, to some extent, clutch is a myth - but it is only a myth for those that are not experts in their fields. Professional athletes are the best of the best in their respective sports, and in that context, clutch is not a myth. The truth behind clutch performances is that those we see as "clutch performers" have " a rich store of past experience, organized into a deep intuitive understanding.'

In Dr. Mark Otten's sports psychology lab, the researchers concluded that we can all be clutch, "provided [we're] in the right mental state." Those in high-pressure situations need to feel like they're in control, as those who felt like they were in control were the most likely to succeed under pressure. Obviously, confidence also helps. So those who feel confident and in control are the most likely to succeed in clutch situations.

I do not, however, find the psychological explanations of clutch performance satisfying. To me, clutch performance is not just a psychological phenomenon, but an art, and to me, an art is something that can never be adequately explained, but instead interpreted. There is no one-size-fit-all explanation, and so I will interpret the two most clutch plays in my favorite professional sport, the NBA. Both these plays took place in Game 7 of the 2016 NBA Finals between the Cleveland Cavaliers and the Golden State Warriors.

The two plays are as follows: Lebron James's game-saving block on Andre Iguodala's open layup out of nowhere, and Kyrie Irving's game-winning three pointer.

One thing is clear: the last two minutes of the game were absolute chaos. By this point in the series, both teams had been worn out and absolutely exhausted. The plays were nothing short of miraculous, as Lebron James was located at half-court while Iguodala was at the free throw line, and Irving's shot was heavily contested. When the stakes were highest, the two players succeeded and thrived. While neither team had scored in more than five minutes, the two players pulled through and won a championship for their team, on the road.

Clutch, for the, constituted not cracking under pressure, but thriving under it. The two of them have faces of laser focus indicating their confidence and sense of control in their situations. That is clutch. The game comes naturally to them, and it seems like they stop thinking as hard and just let it come. The two players slow down, and don't freak out. However, I don't know what is actually going on. in their heads. I am merely speculating, and I will never know unless I'm able to sit down and talk to Kyrie and LeBron one day.

I want to take a lesson from LeBron and Kyrie, too, and learn how I can become more clutch in a phase of high-pressure exams and papers. I want to be more clutch in job interviews, in times I'm usually afflicted with overwhelming anxiety, or in social situations that are incredibly awkward.

So to be clutch in our own lives, the formula in high-pressure seems to be this: feel more confident and in control. Slow down and let things come naturally. I have been able to reach these phases using a mantra that taught me to allow life to come naturally: "no surge." I am not saying the formula or even the mantra works for everyone, but it is a mantra that has worked for me given its emotional and historical significance in my life.

Approaching finals, deadlines at work, or difficult life events, find what works for you. Find out how to be clutch your own way, which is much easier said than done, but I don't need to be telling you how to do things you know best yourself. Look back on past events in your life where you were resilient, where you did succeed in high pressure and high stakes situations. What did you do then? What can you learn from it now?

Related Content

Facebook Comments