A couple of weeks ago I published an article titled, "An Open Letter To The Guy Who Broke My Heart For The Better." My sole purpose in writing that article was to help girls that have been in situations similar to mine cope with the feelings and pain that they felt from it. I wanted to share my story, vulnerability, and pain, in order to help others know that they deserve better and that they should never settle for anything less than. I want them to know that they deserve someone that is going to see their worth.

Now I want to write a "Part 2" of that article to help those girls know how to move forward from these heartbreaking relationships: Where to go from here.

I want to start by advising you to not let feelings of shame and guilt overcome you. So you didn't pick a guy that treated you the greatest, you settled, or maybe you just didn't see any of this coming, fell victim to his games, and got played. Don't beat yourself up over it because that isn't going to change what happened or make you feel any better. Instead, learn from it. Recognize that he had good and bad traits and keep those in mind when you begin to pursue your next relationship.

Also, know that it's ok to not be ok sometimes.

We can tend to have this unrealistic expectation that once a relationship ends we have to immediately be ok and move on from it. It's almost a competition to see who can get into another relationship first, and if you aren't the first one in a new relationship there's a shameful connotation to it.

That's so far from the truth, though.

It's healthy to take some time to lick your wounds and pick yourself back up. It isn't realistic to expect that you'll be just fine as soon as it ends, no matter how badly you want to be. It's a process and you can't skip any steps.

I know it's said over and over again, but take some time to rediscover yourself. Take the things that happened in this past relationship and learn from them; use them to figure out what you are and aren't looking for in the next person you start a relationship with.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, it's ok to be single. I hate that being single is related to feelings of being unwanted and worthlessness because that is so the opposite. You can learn so much about yourself in the seasons of being single. Spend that time working on yourself, bettering yourself, and building your relationship with God.

Trust me, I know what it feels like to have the desire to be in a relationship, to have someone, and to eventually start a family, but remember that there's so much more to this life than being in a relationship.

Next, make sure that you forgive him and yourself. Both of these can be extremely hard things to do, but they are so necessary to moving into that next chapter of your life. Don't hold on to those hurt and angry feelings that you have towards him. Instead, lay them at God's feet and let him deal with your heart.

The Bible tells us that God heals the broken hearted, so He WILL heal you too. If you have any feelings of blame toward yourself for getting in a situation like that, make sure that you forgive yourself as well as him. Sometimes this can be even than forgiving the person that hurt you because we can be our biggest critics.

If that's something you're struggling with, ask God to deal with your heart. Surrender your heart, pain, feelings, and life over to Him so that He can heal you and bless you with all that He has planned for you.

My last piece of advice is don't be discouraged.

God uses people to teach you things, so we know that people are going to come and go.
Don't try to take matters into your own hands and don't assume that you'll never find love because those are both two very easy ways of thinking that we tend to obtain in order to cope with everything.

But instead, trust God and His timing and plan.

I've been reading book by Christine Caine and in it, she writes this:

"God uses events, circumstances, and people to reveal areas where we are not whole, so he can bring healing and prepare us for whatever is next in his plan. He uses different situations in different seasons in the sanctification process, increasingly freeing us from shame. And he does it so that we might learn to receive love and completely love as he does."

You may be in one relationship for your whole life or you may be in several. No matter what it looks like for you, don't get discouraged.

I know for me, my parents were high school sweethearts, so it can be discouraging to have that unrealistic expectation.

Each time my heart was broken, I felt like they couldn't really relate to me because they've only ever been with each other and they found each other so easily.

I've learned that it won't look the same for everyone.

I've been told that with each relationship that ends, it only makes you appreciate the real thing so much more when you do find the person you'll spend the rest of your life with.

So trust God during this season. Turn your hurt and heart over to God and let Him do the work that He has planned to do in your life because we know that He who began a good work in you will continue his work until it is finished. (Philippians 1:6)

And I promise that you will move past this.