About one year ago I moved from Salt Lake City, UT. to Portland OR. Each time I move to a new city and need to navigate its unfamiliar workings without roots or community I seem to gain a handful of new tools that carry me through life’s ever-changing current.
1. Know the difference between being alone and being lonely.
Understand the difference between being alone, and being lonely. You are a complex creature with needs and wants. Acknowledge how you feel and understand that it is okay to feel this way. This requires some patience and drive to keep you moving forward. When you are alone, make sure you are taking care of yourself in the ways that you need to!
2. Experience the newness of where you are.
You are in a new place. Between the new street names, people and flow of the city you have a lot to take in. If you spend all of your time comparing where you are today to where you have been and what you are familiar with, you risk missing a lot of the awe in the now. Humans are creatures of habit, it can be hard to force ourselves out of our habit but there is much to be gained in doing so.
3. Learn how to entertain yourself.
Often transition becomes a bit more pleasurable when we are engaging our minds beyond the transition itself. Challenge yourself to learn a new skill, read a book every week, take up listening to some podcasts and go on long walks. This can be an excellent time to branch out of your comfort zone and get to know yourself in a beautiful new way.
4. Set some goals for yourself.
It can be valuable to give yourself a reason to be where you are, a reason to wake up in the morning. Your goal can be anything from getting a job as a beekeeper to finding ways to avoid commitments altogether. By setting this kind of goal you are giving yourself a sense of purpose and belonging as well as giving yourself something to be proud of.
5. Find Community, grow and build!
Humans are social beings. We need people and we need belonging and connection. Volunteering is a great way to meet like-minded people. Take a class, go to a concert or to the library. Various times in my life when I feel I need more people to connect with, I have pushed myself to say hello to at least one new person every day. I have made amazing friendships doing this. It takes a lot of time to find your people in a new place, be patient.
6. Be Honest with yourself and others around you.
Be honest with yourself about what you want and need. Be honest in the ways that you go about meeting your needs. Be honest about what you are capable of committing to. Strive to be your most authentic self. Lastly, push yourself to try new things, but be honest with yourself about when you need to cut yourself some slack.
