Your high school graduation is a big deal. It marks the end of your high school career. Your hard work has paid off, and now you are on to better things. It’s really a symbol of moving on and looking forward. But your high school graduation is also a time to congratulate yourself on finishing all the hard work that comes with being a high school student. If you’re involved in high school, hard work does not just mean academics. It means working hard to put on a play, to sing in a concert, to play sports, or to be an active member of a club. So what happens when you can’t attend your graduation ceremony?
Last summer, I was in the hospital for a large chunk of my break. It was the summer before I went off to college, so it was scary how I was not in the best health. Even before summer started, I remember knowing something was wrong when on the night of my senior prom, my dad said, “Your eye looks yellow.” My mom, dad, and I all thought it was the lighting of the kitchen that made the skin around my eye yellow, but it was far worse. I still went to prom and had a blast! I felt fine that night. I danced a lot, had some great food, and I got to hang out with friends. What could be better?
In the days to come, I would become even more yellow. My whole face was turning that color, and so was my scalp. I went to see my primary care doctor with my mom. In the end, I was hospitalized. I went to the Emergency Room at Mass General Hospital, and from there, was put into the main building on the 18th floor. The 18th floor is called Ellison. It’s a pediatric floor. I was joyful to be able to go there. The funny thing was that I was two doors down from the room where I stayed when I was having my cancer surgeries. This brought back a lot of hard memories, but it also made me somewhat relieved. I knew my territory; there was nothing new, at least for my living situation. I recognized the hallways and the wonderful, kind nurses. The only thing different was my diagnosis, which my doctors never really came around with a concise one. It still remains a mystery.
I had to undergo an ERCP, which I still count as a surgery, but it’s not that exactly. My doctors had to investigate inside my body. I still needed anesthesia. When I was released out of the hospital, I went right to the Next Step summer barbecue! Nothing could stop me from partying with my Next Steppers! But as I was leaving the party and everyone was saying, “Bye Grace,” I felt really dizzy. It was a hot day and I had not been drinking a lot of water, so my parents and I assumed the dizziness was due to dehydration.
As the days progressed, I kept feeling dizzier and dizzier. I was sleeping all of the time because I felt exhausted. When I say all the time, I mean all the time. I would have breakfast and then go to sleep, have lunch and then go to sleep. I would sleep for long periods of time. The dizziness would strike at any moment, and I would have to sit down. If my mom and I were going anywhere, I always had to sit down first and drink some water. The dizziness was so intense. The whole world was spinning around me, literally and metaphorically. I had to walk very slowly because I would have fallen if I was not more careful. Eventually, my mom took me to the doctor’s office to get blood drawn. Oh joy!
It got to the point last summer where I was famous in the blood lab! I would go in there practically every week. My mom always requested Patrick, who was the best person ever to take my blood because it never hurt. He always had a great sense of humor too. While getting blood drawn is not my favorite pastime, Patrick made it fun.
Before the five-year landmark of being in remission from my cancer surgeries, I had to see my doctors at the Chordoma Clinic every six months. Now I see them every year! When my mom and I were on the way to my regular appointment, my primary care called. She told my mom that my blood levels were so low that I needed to be hospitalized right away. We were already at Mass General, so right after my appointment, my doctor was able to get us right into Ellison. I had to use a wheelchair to get around because I was so dizzy. What happened was that when my doctors performed the ERCP, they made a small cut which caused internal bleeding. That is why I was so dizzy. It was not a fun time.
I was hoping to go to my high school graduation, but because of this bleed, I was not able to. My mom tried to work it out where I could try to make it, but there was no way. The nurses were so kind about the whole thing. They were sad that I missed my graduation. But the amazing part was that my incredible music therapist at Next Step and my music therapist from when I received radiation at MGH arranged for me to perform one of my original songs that I wrote at Next Step! And the nurses created a fake diploma. It was such a nice gesture.
Another kind gesture was how my graduating class arranged a graduation ceremony just for me! Most of my graduating class came in their cap and gowns. I received my diploma. My mom brought a big cake with my picture on it. This event was incredible and I am so blessed to have had it come together. It was so kind of the Class of 2015. Plus, a picture of me, my mom, and my dad was on the front page of the town’s newspaper! I was famous!
While I wish I could have gone to my graduation, I am glad that I was able to have a separate ceremony. It just shows that I left high school with a bang! I’m different, and I’ve come to accept and love that about me. We are all unique. Go live your life with your own flare.
