A Few Misconceptions About Introverts

A Few Misconceptions About Introverts

Being an introvert doesn't mean you are anti-social
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It's hard to understand what being an introvert actually means if you don't identify as one. It's also hard to understand the extroverted side of things as well. The common knowledge is introvert means shy and antisocial. However that isn't entirely the case all the time and I have found there are many assumptions and sets of expectations that come along when someone realizes you are an introvert. Even though the definition of an introvert reads "a shy, reticent person," there is absolutely more of a gray area to it when classifying and understanding why someone identifies this way.

Here are some of the misunderstandings I have encountered along the way:

1. Introverts don't like to socialize. Ever. In actuality, there are many times when introverts do very much enjoy being at a large social gathering and interacting with new people. The difference here between someone who is introverted and someone who is extroverted is that it might come more naturally for the extroverted individual to mingle and put themselves out there. Introverts are usually most comfortable in small intimate groups with people they know very well, and that being said they are able to interact with strangers, but it can sometimes be exhausting to do so. Introverts may not be as inclined to go out as often as extroverts and that doesn't mean they fully reject socializing at all times.

2. Introverts aren't good with asserting themselves and lack confidence. Another example here that comes to mind relates to the work place. I think a typical assumption is introverts don't have the capacity to stand up for themselves in a group setting, or at a certain job because of their reticent nature and this is very much not the case. Identifying as an introvert doesn't mean you don't feel comfortable with going after what you want and being passive. It is certainly more of a challenge for one to do this because it doesn't come as naturally for an introvert to talk to someone they don't know very well. But none of that means an introvert will refrain from going out of their way to stand up for their best interest.


3. Introverts want to be left alone all the time. Yes, introverts need their own personal time to recharge, as opposed to extroverts who typically get their energy from being around people. However there isn't a constant state of solitary an introvert needs to become immersed in. It just helps to have a night in alone sometimes to feel more refreshed. Introverts do enjoy the company of people but in smaller doses. So someone should never think that a person who identifies as this doesn't want them around, it just means they may need a break for a little while to gather themselves.

Obviously I can't pinpoint the exact misunderstandings that coincide with introverts and everyone has different social preferences. But one thing that is certain is just because someone is more inclined to identify as an introvert never means they absolutely don't want other people around and make no effort. They just enjoy their alone time sometimes to recharge!

Cover Image Credit: http://www.bracewalk.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/introvert1.jpg

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I'd Rather Be Single Than Settle – Here Is Why Being Picky Is Okay

They're on their best behavior when you're dating.
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Dating nowadays described in one word: annoying.

What's even more annoying? when people tell you that you're being too "picky" when it comes to dating. Yes, from an outside perspective sometimes that's exactly what it looks like; however, when looking at it from my perspective it all makes sense.

I've heard it all:

"He was cute, why didn't you like him?"

"You didn't even give him a chance!"

"You pay too much attention to the little things!"

What people don't understand is that it's OKAY to be picky when it comes to guys. For some reason, girls in college freak out and think they're supposed to have a boyfriend by now, be engaged by the time they graduate, etc. It's all a little ridiculous.

However, I refuse to put myself on a time table such as this due to the fact that these girls who feel this way are left with no choice but to overlook the things in guys that they shouldn't be overlooking, they're settling and this is something that I refuse to do.

So this leaves the big question: What am I waiting for?

Well, I'm waiting for a guy who...

1. Wants to know my friends.

Blessed doesn't even begin to describe how lucky I am to have the friends that I do.

I want a guy who can hang out with my friends. If a guy makes an effort to impress your friends then that says a lot about him and how he feels about you. This not only shows that he cares about you but he cares about the people in your life as well.

Someone should be happy to see you happy and your friends contribute to that happiness, therefore, they should be nothing more than supportive and caring towards you and your friendships.

2. Actually, cares to get to know me.

Although this is a very broad statement, this is the most important one. A guy should want to know all about you. He should want to know your favorite movie, favorite ice cream flavor, favorite Netflix series, etc. Often, (the guys I get stuck on dates with) love to talk about themselves: they would rather tell you about what workout they did yesterday, what their job is, and what they like to do rather than get to know you.

This is something easy to spot on the first date, so although they may be "cute," you should probably drop them if you leave your date and can recite everything about their life since the day they were born, yet they didn't catch what your last name was.

3. How they talk about other women.

It does not matter who they're talking about, if they call their ex-girlfriend crazy we all know she probably isn't and if she is it's probably their fault.

If they talk bad about their mom, let's be honest, if they're disrespecting their mother they're not going to respect you either. If they mention a girl's physical appearances when describing them. For example, "yeah, I think our waitress is that blonde chick with the big boobs"

Well if that doesn't hint they're a complete f* boy then I don't know what else to tell you. And most importantly calling other women "bitches" that's just disrespectful.

Needless to say, if his conversations are similar to ones you'd hear in a frat house, ditch him.

4. Phone etiquette.

If he can't put his phone down long enough to take you to dinner then he doesn't deserve for you to be sitting across from him.

If a guy is serious about you he's going to give you his undivided attention and he's going to do whatever it takes to impress you and checking Snapchat on a date is not impressive. Also, notice if his phone is facedown, then there's most likely a reason for it.

He doesn't trust who or what could pop up on there and he clearly doesn't want you seeing. Although I'm not particularly interested in what's popping up on their phones, putting them face down says more about the guy than you think it does.

To reiterate, it's okay to be picky ladies, you're young, there's no rush.

Remember these tips next time you're on a date or seeing someone, and keep in mind: they're on their best behavior when you're dating. Then ask yourself, what will they be like when they're comfortable? Years down the road? Is this what I really want? If you ask yourself these questions you might be down the same road I have stumbled upon, being too picky.. and that's better than settling.

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20 Things I'd Do If The Concept Of Time Was Abolished

If only our lives weren't limited by time.

amrojas
amrojas
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Recently, news outlets have been reporting on how the people of Sommarøy, a Norwegian island located north of the arctic circle, would like to remove the concept of time. This is largely in part due to the fact that the sun does not set during much of the summer nor does it rise during the winter. The inhabitants of Sommarøy do not have rigidly separated days and nights like the rest of the world and can be found doing normal daytime activities at 2 am in the summers.

They also would like to take clocks out of their society. Although this lifestyle might seem impractical to the rest of us, I couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to live in a world where time is irrelevant, in regards to the concept AND the physical effects of its passing. This newfound information gave rise to ideas of things (some simple, some whimsical) I'd do if the concept of time did not exist and we had as much time to do the things we wanted.

1. Live on a ship at sea.

2. Watch a flower grow from a seed to its death.

3. Apply as much makeup as desired without being late.

4. Retake my favorite college courses and participate as fully as I possibly can, including the completion of every single reading and film.

5. Take a non-stop trip through every country in the world.

6. Learn to play and fully master every single musical instrument in existence.

7. Watch a full rotation of Earth around the sun from space.

8. Live by myself in a cabin at the edge of the woods a la Thoreau.

9. Reread every single book that shaped my childhood.

10. Have a brief conversation with every old friend.

11. Re-drink that first sip of the perfect cup of coffee.

12. Observe how the tides change with the lunar cycle.

13. Learn as many languages as possible.

14. Sit at the beach and listen to music for days.

15. Train for an Olympic event.

16. Write a detailed, thorough analysis of every track in my favorite movie soundtracks.

17. Take a photo of every interesting place I visit and every little nook I find peace in and make a physical photo album.

18. Cook food without burning it.

19. Watch a star's life cycle from birth to death.

20. Replay the feeling of coming home.

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