This one goes out to the misunderstood girl.
I would define that for you, but if you’re who I am writing to, then you know exactly who you are and what this feels like.
You have probably already come to the conclusion that there isn’t a soul on this earth that thinks or feels the same way you do. No one could possibly comprehend the inner workings of your mind -- shoot, half the time, you can’t even comprehend them. And you see this as a bad thing. So you keep quiet. For fear that you might be misunderstood.
You might find that you live more inside of your head than out. You’re a daydreamer. You follow all the travel accounts on Instagram and live vicariously through Alexis and Jay’s YouTube videos in Hawaii (it must be nice). You spend a lot of time browsing through travel blogs so you can stare wide-eyed at all the beautiful places you can’t afford to go.
You have a lot to say, but fear being misunderstood. So you can get mistaken for the shy, quiet girl; even if your personality is the opposite.
When you listen to music, you aren’t passive; you get lost in it. It’s an outlet. You love when you find a song that sounds like it was written for you. It’s rare, so when you find it, you soak in every lyric and it’s usually on repeat for two weeks straight.
You want to see the world, but you’re stuck looking at it through a glass box. Maybe you’re like me and you’re frustrated with where you are in life because you are still stuck in your hometown. You have a wandering mind, big eyes for the world around you, but a small wallet and a lot of roadblocks. Or maybe you feel like no one around you understands your desire to travel, so you keep to yourself about it, but it’s on your mind every single day.
Growing up, you’ve probably been asked, most likely by your parents, “Why do you spend so much time in your room?” or “What is going on in that head of yours?” Maybe you’ve even been told that you need to stop daydreaming and get with the real world.
“Be realistic.”
Ugh. I hate that. Where’s the fun in that?
The world might have you pinned as an introvert (I prefer the term “wallflower,” not because it is any less harsh, but it just sounds prettier) because you don’t go out as much as everyone else. You might get more enjoyment out of discovering a new coffee shop and spending hours writing about anything and everything on your mind. When you get sad or angry or frustrated, you might go for a drive and turn your go-to “chill out” song on as loud as it takes to drown out your thoughts. You roll the windows down because the wind in your hair makes you feel free from it all.
You don't mind being alone. Shopping alone, eating alone, to you, it's just a time to enjoy your own presence and discover new things about yourself. You like the feeling of independence and privacy just as much as you like hanging out with friends.
You deal with pain a lot differently than others. You don’t always want to talk about it. In fact, most times, you find yourself trying to run from it. You go for a drive or you attempt to sleep it off. Your friends and family don’t understand why you can’t just be open with your feelings, but how do you explain to them that that’s just your way of coping? Or explain to them that they won’t understand, without them labeling you as a typical teenager.
When you fall for someone, you fall hard. Because your idea of love doesn’t come from what you see in movies. It’s beautifully constructed in your own mind, a love like no other. And you want it. You want passionate, raw, unapologetic love. A love you feel the rest of the world is blind to. And when you find someone else that sees love in the same light, someone that also sees color in a world full of gray, you immediately cling to that person. Why? Because they understand you. And you didn’t think that was possible. You found someone to go to when no one else gets it. And you don’t want to lose that.
When you do, oh, when you lose that, it’s a pain like no other. And although it’s heartbreak and you know we all deal with it at some point in our lives, you still somehow manage to feel completely alone in your feelings. Doomed to be lonely and misunderstood for the rest of your life.
But listen, you’re not.
OK, maybe you can't relate to all of those things, but no matter what you are feeling right now, there is someone else on this planet who feels the same. You think I’m wrong, but I wouldn’t have taken the time to write this and share it if I didn’t feel like someone out there could relate (if you need proof, just join Tumblr). The truth is, we are all a bit misunderstood. It’s why we have corruption, violence, break-ups, depression, so much of the pain in this world comes from misunderstanding; failing to see something or someone through the eyes of another.
We all have hopes and dreams, and we all get frustrated and sad when we fail to get there. Not everyone is going to understand those dreams. Who cares? If it’s right to you, do it. Don’t ever stop dreaming. Don’t ever let someone make you feel like your goal isn’t reachable or that it’s (ugh) “unrealistic.” Remember, a lot of great things in this world have come to us from people who were misunderstood at one point.
You cope differently. So what? The important people in your life will understand and accept that about you. You may feel misunderstood, but you are not invisible. Your thoughts, your ideas, your pain, your struggles, your dreams, they matter. Don’t push away the people who try to understand. When it comes to your feelings, express, don’t supress. Even if you fear being misunderstood.
Above all, take comfort in knowing that your mind is beautiful and unique and that there isn’t a soul on this earth who thinks exactly like you do. Congratulations, you make the world less gray.
But what do I know?
Most of the time, I’m just misunderstood.
