10 Ways College Will Change Your Mindset

10 Ways College Will Change Your Mindset

Moving away from home and starting your life will teach you a lot about yourself.

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When I first started college back in 2017, I really didn't think my life would change that much. But as my sophomore year is wrapping up, looking back on the past two years makes me realize how much I really have changed as a person.

1. Your comfort zone isn't all that comfortable

In fact, it's probably the thing that will make you the most uncomfortable. When I started college, I totally thought that I would stick to my normal status-quo and that friends would come to me and we would have so much fun. I imagined we would do all of the things I did for fun at home and that I wouldn't really have to change my habits or my comfort levels to make friends and spend time with them. And oh, how wrong I was - but in the best way. I found out the hard way that if you want to make friends, you have to put yourself out there. You have to be willing to make compromises and try new things and experience life in a new way. My comfort zone is miles and miles wider than it was before I started college. I eat new foods, have new hobbies, go to new places, and have the best people to do those things with.

2. You're not as good with money as you think you are

Oh man. This is another lesson that I learned in the hardest way possible. Before I started college, I had a savings account with graduation money and some money that I and my parents had saved up over the last few years when I was in high school; I also had some money from working the summer before college started. Long story short, I ended up spending my entire savings account and all of my summer money during my freshman year of college. I finally had free reign over my finances and I took advantage of it in the worst way possible. However, I'm doing a lot better this year after learning a very hard lesson and being very broke the summer after my freshman year.

3. Waking up early is actually a lot more fun than staying up late

I know. It sounds gross. But I can't tell you how many times I brag about waking up at 6 am and getting tons of work done while my friends complain about staying up until 3 am and being behind in two classes. Plus, waking up early lets you go to bed early. Or take a nap because you have all your work done already. Trust me, you won't be losing any more sleep. And 8ams don't seem that bad!

4. FOMO is so, so real 

When I was in high school, canceling plans with my friends was never really a big deal to me. Maybe I wanted to take a nap or eat dinner at home instead. I never really got jealous of my friends hanging out without me. But then I got to college... and now I can't say no to anything. I triple book myself 5 nights a week just so I know I'm not missing out on anything fun. It's exhausting, but so much fun.

5. You get really possessive over inanimate objects

Like your favorite floor at the library. Or your unassigned assigned seat in class. Or the belongings that you totally thought you wouldn't mind your roommate touching but now you feel like you need to put them in a locked safe. Or the pair of heels you lent to a girl on your hall to go to her formal and didn't get back for 3 months.

6. Dining hall food isn't all that bad 

Only because it's free. Refer back to number 2 on this list.

7. You really are a zombie without coffee

I can't operate on my 8 am days anymore without a soy chai or a caramel macchiato. I won't. I refuse. I drink more coffee than water. It's bad.

8. It's okay if friendships and relationships don't work out 

In college, everyone is finding themselves. If someone ends up not being right for you, that's okay. Most people are mature enough to go separate ways and move on. Deciding that your boyfriend of almost a year isn't going to be the man you marry is okay. Sure, it'll be really hard to readjust and maybe you'll have to find a new group of friends, but everyone is continuously searching for the complements that can help them find themselves. Breaking off one friendship or relationship that isn't good for you or doesn't make you happy could result in 5 new friendships and a better significant other falling right in your lap.

9. You really care about sports

Or at least, you have fun watching them. When I was in high school, I went to the occasional basketball game because my friend was on the team, and I was dragged to a handful of football games. In college, I wake up at 9 am on Saturdays to walk all the way across campus to watch basketball games, I sit in the blistering sun for baseball games, and I do everything I can to end up in the stadium for every single football game. It's the most fun ever and really sends your school spirit levels through the roof.

10. Being yourself is the best thing you can do

In high school, I struggled a lot with wanting to fit in and sacrificing certain parts of myself to make sure that happened. I thought I would have to do the same in college, but I never have. I decided to be myself from day one and as a result, I am surrounded by a boyfriend and friends that truly love me and accept me for who I am and are friends with me even though I don't pretend around them as I did in high school. College also taught me a lot about self-love and that there is always someone who will love and support you exactly as you are.

As my sophomore year comes to an end and I prepare myself for my last semester, I can't wait to see the last few lessons that college has in store for me before I graduate. The changes I have made to my mindset so far are ones that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

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My Freckles Are Not A Beauty Trend For You To Appropriate And Immitate

Those with faces full of freckles can't wipe them off like you can after a photo shoot.

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While it is fun to use makeup to express yourself, one can argue unless you are in costume, it should be used to enhance your features, not create new ones. The trend of artificial freckles puts a nasty taste in my mouth reminiscent to the feeling I get when I see a Caucasian woman apply such dark foundation to her face that she appears to be donning blackface.

To someone who has a face full of freckles, it is offensive to see you paint on freckles as if they were not permanent features of other people's skin that they cannot remove with a makeup wipe. I remember asking my cousin at 5 years old if I could surgically remove my freckles and crying when she broke to me that I'd be stuck with what she called giraffe spots my whole life.

I'm not alone in feeling self-conscious about my freckles. The face is the fulcrum of the identity, and it can feel like my facial identity is like a haphazard splash of orange/brown debris. Another against the fake freckles movement retorts: "you'll soon regret them when people begin to describe you as a polka-dot-skinned troll or a cinnamon-toast-faced goblin. Also, when your eyebags start to sag in middle-age, that 'cute' skin art will probably deteriorate into something more closely resembling oblong blackheads. Sincerely, A Freckled Person"

One woman recalls her struggle with accepting the patterns of her skin from a very young age:

“When I was a young girl, I remember staring at myself in my bathroom mirror and imagining my face without the scattered brown dots that littered my face and body. I dreamed of having the small imperfections removed from my face and obtaining the smooth porcelain skin that I envied. I looked at my bare-faced friends in awe because they had what I wanted and would never know. For some odd reason, I had made myself believe that my freckles made me ugly."

I've come to appreciate the beauty of these sun kisses, and many nowadays have too. However, freckles haven't always been considered cute. There is a history of contempt toward red reader freckled people, just ask Anne Shirley! The dramatic young heroine laments: "Yes, it's red," she said resignedly. "Now you see why I can't be perfectly happy. Nobody could who had red hair. I don't mind the other things so much — the freckles and the green eyes and my skinniness. I can imagine them away. I can imagine that I have a beautiful rose-leaf complexion and lovely starry violet eyes. But I cannot imagine that red hair away. I do my best. I think to myself, "Now my hair is a glorious black, black as the raven's wing." But all the time I know it is just plain red, and it breaks my heart. It will be my lifelong sorrow." (Montgomery).

Historically, freckles on ones face have been seen as dirty or imperfect. It's easy to forget that Irish features such as red hair and freckles have been subject to hateful discrimination for centuries. In some places, the word ginger is even used as a slur.

I am not a red-headed stepchild for you to beat — or for you to appropriate.

My facial texture is not a toy for you to play with.

It is rude and inconsiderate to pock your face for a selfie while those with randomly splashed spots get someone once a week trying to rub off the "dirt speck" on their face.

Greg Stevens has a theory to why there is anti-red prejudice

“Skin tone is another one of those well-studied features that has been shown to consistently have an impact on people's assessment of physical beauty: Those with clear, evenly-colored skin are widely regarded as being more attractive than people with patchy, blotchy, or freckled skin.
Nowhere is this more obvious than when looking at professional photos of redheaded models and celebrities. Even those "hot redheads" that flaunt the redness of their hair usually are made-up on magazine covers to have almost unnaturally even skin tones. Moreover, there is a reasonable theory to explain why the bias against freckles might be more than just a cultural prejudice. Not to be too blunt about it, but freckles are cancer factories."

By that, the author means freckles can be early indicators of sun damage or skin cancer. This illusion that freckles indicate deficiency may also play in negative connotations toward a person with freckles

While I acknowledge the intention of people with clear skin who paint freckles on their face isn't to offend — rather it is to appreciate freckles as a beauty statement — the effect is still offensive. If you are thinking about trying this freckle fad, you should put down your fine tipped brush and consider what it would be like if you couldn't wipe away the spots.

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It’s Okay To Be Vulnerable

Vulnerability Is Not A Bad Thing.

merew14
merew14
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One of the scariest things in the world is vulnerability. Letting someone is and allowing them to know what's going on can be absolutely terrifying, but life is a lot harder when you're doing it alone. Now let's just get on with thing clear, vulnerability is very much a struggle for the writer of this blog.

I've always kept what's going on to myself because I didn't want my burdens to become burdens for those around me and I have trusted people before and completely was robbed of it. Over the years of struggles with anxiety and depression, I've learned that holding it in and not being vulnerable is one of the most unhealthy things you can do and makes everything so much worse. The good thing about being vulnerable isn't that you get to choose who's you're vulnerable with.

You don't have to be vulnerable with everyone, but you need to be vulnerable with someone. People were placed in your life for a purpose and there are people around you who do care and who want to be let in. Don't hold back when it comes to those who care about you most. Vulnerability is a hard thing to face, but it is an amazing thing to allow yourself to face.

Vulnerability breaks down barriers, helps you find your own inner strength and brings you closer to the ones who want to build that relationship with you. Vulnerability with the wrong person sucks, but vulnerability with the right person is amazing. Don't let the bad that came from the vulnerability with the wrong person stop you from being vulnerable with the right person. That person that has been with you through it all, that person that loves you for you and not what you can offer them, that person that wants the absolute best for you and challenges you to be the absolute best, that's the right person, that's the person to be vulnerable with.

Open up and talk because people want to listen.

merew14
merew14

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