Do Millennials Believe In Soul Mates?

Do Millennials Believe In Soul Mates?

Does the generation with the oldest median age to get married believe in predestined relationships?

Oxford Dictionary defines soulmates as "A person ideally suited to another as a close friend or romantic partner." But can you really put a textbook definition to such a strong word? Looking deeper, I tried to find the beginnings of the name, before the poems and the music preaching about pre-destined relationships and "the one."

According to, "The concepts of soulmates arose from Hellenic mythology. According to the story, our ancestors once had 2 heads, 4 arms. They did something to offend a god so that god punished them by splitting them down the middle, resulting in the creation of humans. As a punishment, we are condemned to spend our lives searching for the other half, our soulmates."

But do millennials believe in this notion? Millennials have the highest median age for marriage compared to every other generation. (For women the median age is 27 for marriage and the median for men is 29.) Do millennial's believe the history and destiny tied to the words "soul mate?"

Here is what 17 millennials had to say when I asked them what they thought of these 2 words.

1. "I think soul mates exist, but I don't think they're necessarily romantic. Everyone meets their soul mate, but you may not realize it because you're too busy looking for perfection elsewhere."
- Grace. 19

2. "In the Bible, there is not a verse that specifically states that each person has one soul mate, but I do believe that God guides us in all areas of our lives. Especially our romantic relationships."
- Jen. 22

3. "Yes, I believe in soul mates. Mostly, kindred spirits. It doesn't have to be a romantic thing."
- Jose. 19

4. "I do not believe in soul mates. I believe that there is most definitely a reason that we end up with the person we marry, but I don't think there is just one person out there for everyone. There are many emotional ties that you may only feel for one person, but I don't think that necessarily makes them your soul mate."
- Shannon. 20

5. "I don’t believe in soul mates, but I do believe that God puts people in your life for a reason."
- Makena. 19

6. "From a gospel-centered view, I believe in soul mates functionally but not practically. God has planned who I am going to marry, but it is not my business to figure it out prior to meeting her at the altar."
- Tyler. 22

7. "I believe that we all have soul mates; one person that we are meant to love for our lifetime. Meaning that no matter how long or short there is one person destined for us all and we only will have the pleasure of meeting them if we work hard to make all relationships worthwhile. This, in theory, sounds so easy, but I believe that relationships take work so it is something that requires effort and does not just happen on its own."
- Lauren. 19

8. "I don't believe in soul mates. I don't think that relationships are predestined, they need work and communication to thrive."
- Jake. 20

9. "I think soul-mates are real, they're that someone who you never dread seeing. It doesn't have to be romantic, you just click with that person."
- Kenzie. 16

10. "I don’t believe in soul mates soul mates, but I believe that God has a certain person picked out for us that we are meant to be with. And through Him, He will lead us to cross paths and everything will click."
- Lily. 19

11. "I do believe in soul mates but with a twist. I believe that there are a select few that could potentially be a soul mate. I believe that who we choose to marry is directed by God."
- Andrew. 20

12. "I don't believe in soul mates, I believe you can find someone you mesh with."
- Larsa. 21

13. "No. If you find someone who lines up with your core values, it could be anyone.
- Kyle. 20.

14. "I do believe that soul mates are real. A soul mate is a person that God intended you to be with. The person who is undeniably the one that your heart longs for."
- Rosalie. 18

15. "I don't necessarily believe in soulmates. I believe I have control over who I end up with, within the word of the God."
- Brandon. 22

16. "No, I do not. I think that there are several people that you could happily spend your life with entirely in love. However, I think that once you find someone who is right for you, your love can last forever."
- Mackenzie. 20

17. "I, being the hopeless romantic and cynic all in one, still believe in soul mates. I've always believed that there is someone out there in the world that a person belongs with. Now, I don't think it's some love at first sight type stuff and that it'll be perfect with zero ups and downs. I think it's a matter of being with a person who compliments you in every way but also pushes you to be better than you were the day before. Sometimes your soul mate turns out to be a person you just met or it's a person you've been friends with your entire life. Who knows. I think that's the only crappy part- you never really know for sure."
- Maribel. 19

Cover Image Credit: Toa Heftiba

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To The Sweet Girl With A Broken Heart

Words of wisdom for every girl...


To the sweet girl with a broken heart,

Do you feel like you're stuck in this hole, six feet under, with absolutely no way to get out? You are not alone, and I promise you there is a ladder just waiting for you to climb it. I know your heart feels like it's been shot, and your gut feels like it's been punched one hundred times.

This feeling is just temporary, and I can tell you that because I've experienced it first hand. I know you feel alone, and like you're the only person who has ever felt this much heartache. I can promise you that you are never alone, and there are so many girls that can relate to you in ways you never thought possible. Don't let one guy dictate your way of life. Don't let one guy dull your sparkle.

Don't let one guy change your heart, or your remarkable personality. Sounds really silly when you read it back doesn't it? All of this hurt, tears, and confusion over one guy! Don't get me wrong, I know that this one guy was your world, you truly thought he was going to be in your life forever.

Up until this point, you didn't see a life without him in it. Girlfriend, look at yourself in the mirror. You are doing this whole breakup thing all on your own, and you're doing a great job at it. You picked up the pieces, and are carrying on all by yourself. You have been through the most extreme roller coaster of emotions, and you road it solo.

That says something, something really special. That says that you are stronger than you ever thought you were. Realize that! This is God's plan for you, to show you just how amazing you are. That you can conquer all things, and handle them in the most graceful way possible.

You are special. You are beautiful. You are unique. You are you! And that's one hell of a thing to be because you are the only you on this planet!

Lift your chin up, hold your head high, and show the world exactly who you are. Never change for anybody. Ever! Heck, get back to that girl you were before him. Strong, independent, confident, selfish. I know the word selfish seems so, well, selfish. But It's okay to be selfish sometimes, especially when it comes to defending your own heart.

Take that vacation, dress up just because, do your makeup and take selfies just because you want to, go to the gym, get that tan, go to that party, spend time with your greatest friends, hug your mom!

Do all of these things carelessly, do them because you deserve it, and because you can! And at first you may be doing them as a distraction from all that you've been through, but soon enough you'll find that you're doing them not because you need to, but because you want to!

Simply because this really is the new and improved you. Learn from this pain. Learn to love yourself again without him, without constantly feeling like you need to be reminded by him that you are loved. Instead, love yourself and I assure you when other people see that, they'll love you even more.

Girls, when we love someone, we love deeply, we love wholeheartedly, and that person never has to question our love for them. You deserve that same exact love in return. There are plenty of other guys out there just waiting to take care of your heart, and love you unconditionally. You deserve nothing but that!

Do not stop until you find that guy. You can change the world just by being a kind hearted human being. Don't get revenge, don't force yourself to move on as quickly as he did, don't torture yourself with remembering "the old him," and definitely don't change. I know it's hard to see him changing in the worst way, to the point where you don't even recognize him anymore. To the point where he feels like a complete stranger to you.

Do not stoop to his level. Trust me, one day, he will look back on his life and probably regret losing you. Of course, I know all you're wishing is that he'd be able to see that right now, but that just isn't God's plan. Be patient with yourself. Allow yourself the time to grieve, and hurt, and be upset.

Those are all good things.

That is what is going to allow you to heal, and move on to become a better, stronger, happier, and more mature you! I promise you, that a year from now all that you're stressing about will not mean a thing. This is our one and only chance at life, we can not let one person take away all the happiness that we deserve.

The right guy will never leave, even when times get tough he will always fight for you. I saw something on twitter that said, "take sex away and you'll come to realize that not many individuals have much to offer. This generation is so pressed for the physicality that ya'll forget mentality creates the bond and forms longevity."

That hit extremely close to home for me and is something that everyone needs to remember.

Fall in love with somebody's heart, mind, and soul. Go beyond their looks, go beyond the attraction, dig deeper. Don't be that shallow girl, who doesn't know how to love the right way. You are so much better than that. To every single broken hearted girl, I am so proud of you! I am always here for you, you have so much love and support. I've realized that myself. As I write this, I feel relief, no longer sad or dwelling on the past. What is coming is always better than what is gone. Now get that beautiful smile back on your face because you are too pretty to be sad.

P.S. To the "other girl" (if there is one).

How dare you take him away from me? You knew exactly what you were doing. You knew my whole heart was on the line. Women need to start respecting other women. Think before you act. Would you want to be in my position? I sure as hell hope not, and now that you have him I hope you're thinking about how you hurt me. And if you're not, then you have a lot to learn about life hunny.

It's kinda weird because I can't hate either of you. Simply because I want nothing but the best for him. It's crazy how someone can break your heart into a million pieces, but you still have such a special place in your shattered heart for them. Besides that, take good care of him. I hope he can learn from you, and love you in all the ways he couldn't love me or any of his other ex's. Every relationship is a lesson, and there is always something to learn. So thank you for teaching me mine.

P.S- To "the guy who did this" Imagine you have a daughter someday, and some boy breaks her heart the way you did mine. I hope you think back to this, and remember me. Maybe by that time, you'll feel sorry.

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