By reading the title, I am sure one would assume that this is just another rant about how frustrating it is to be in your early twenties and see a lot of your friends getting married. While there may be some venting, I can assure you that this piece will be more about accepting yourself as you navigate your personal journey while not judging those young souls who decide to commit themselves a little earlier than others feel comfortable with.

The other day I was looking in the mirror wondering if everyone looked this teenage-like in their twenties. I think we can all relate to the notion that when we were younger we saw people in their twenties as mature adults who had the world figured out. Recently, I've been feeling quite the opposite. I nanny full-time and often I realize that the kids I nanny are more secure and certain than I am! Maybe this is because they don't have to worry about as much as I do at the moment...or because the world has not yet tainted their perspective. Their childlike spirit and vigor for life has both refreshed and drained my energy at times. As I observe these children and families, I realize that having children and a family is a sacrifice at times because your purpose is centered around others, your home, and maintaining a livable environment, while I am over here barely eating three meals a day, but going out to cafe and bars almost daily. My life is about me and self-discovery. At the drop of a hat I can travel anywhere I want, drop out of school, apply for school, volunteer, and go on countless adventures, but doing these things alone can often be difficult. The twenties for me have been more about finding peace through the uncertainty and being okay with times of solitude. However, some find that person and realize that they can still have self-discovery while being in partnership with them.

The twenties, I am quickly learning, is not the path of the secure, certain, or confident, but rather the path of uncertainty, doubts, change, and living in the moment. However, as I look around, I see that many of my friends are quickly getting engaged, married, and having children, and I realize that not every twenty-something-year-old feels these feelings as intensely as I do. I have little room to speak on the topic, as I had an unplanned pregnancy...but that's just the thing. It was UNPLANNED....to my surprise it appears that some young couples in fact planned to have children right now.

I used to and still sometimes do judge couples like this. But as I continue to live life, I realize how utterly unfair the assumption that twenty-something-year-olds aren't ready for marriage, commitment, stability, and children just because I am not. Some young couples are in fact ready for all of this, but some individuals like myself have a different path...this may have nothing to do with maturity versus immaturity; it could just be that my life's purpose as a single person is not yet complete and I want time to discover how I can make a difference before settling down, while others know how to make a difference while already settling down. Also, there is this whole other factor of just meeting the right person. The truth is, I have not yet met anyone that I would feel comfortable settling down with. If I can't handle a partner for the day, why would I decide to commit to chilling with them for a lifetime! That's a big freakin' deal!!!

So, is "everyone my age getting married?" Nope. Are a lot of people my age getting hitched? Yeah, but that doesn't mean I or others should feel pressure to! On both sides of the spectrum, it's okay to be where you are, whether that be marriage or singledom. Don't let others judge your situation or let it define you!