Millennial Communication

Millennial Communication

Okay, Ok, K.

I want to live in a world where I do not have to decipher between ok and okay. Or the ramifications of a period after a sentence. Where I’m not ruled by millennial texting regulations, or coding on social media. Where the thing that was created to simplify communication is not over complicated and drawn out. Where responding with one word means that’s the answer to the question you asked, and not every text message requires a response or a continuance.

I shouldn’t have to call two girlfriends, start a group chat and lose sleep over whether he meant a date or hanging out. Whether it’s too early to answer his text message… Should I throw an lol in there so it doesn’t sound so harsh? Should I say alright instead of sure so I don’t sound too passive? Is yes the same as yep or does yep define an attitude?

I don’t know about you, but I can see why there’s so many texting while driving campaigns.
We attempt to be safe by asking Siri to respond to our text with “okay”. So Siri types “ok” but then we have to apologize for the “ok” because even though I meant “okay” I didn’t mean “ok”, okay? Insert nervous lol. But there’s nothing funny about it, because the person on the other side of that text message is already typing up a passive aggressive message about your attitude because of “ok”.

But in a world full of women looking for some attention to subsequent the horrible barrage of fuck boys and lack of emotional in-person connection, we utilize whatever means we can to communicate with whatever sense of relationships we can make.
Which means you text… a lot.

He hasn’t answered in a hot minute… so obviously it’s over. It wasn’t meant to be, I suppose it’s for the best though. Anyone that uses hi instead of hey makes me uncomfortable anyway. Could you really not be bothered to add one letter?
Do I really care this much?

Well, we hung out. My friends told me not to hook up on the first date, but I didn’t know if it was a date. What if I ruined it because it wasn’t a date and it was just a hook up, but I thought it was a date… so we didn’t hook up? Now I don’t have a hook up tale for the girls or a great first date story for my mom.
This is awkward.

But the funny thing is, I don’t want to Netflix and chill. I want to talk about books, or food, or anything that lights a fire inside you. I don’t even care if you ask about my interests to be honest. I’m just checking to make sure you’re making at least 20% eye contact, that my shirt isn’t too low cut and that I’m giving off the right “I’m not trying to fuck you” vibes while also entertaining the idea that if you wanted to text me after this, there’s definitely a possibility for some flirty banter.
But you won’t because there’s a three day rule.

It’s been three days, and I haven’t heard from him.
I’ll post a selfie on Instagram to try and get a reaction out of him.
Oh, first like! Wait, does that mean he was creeping? Or accidental page refresh at the right time? Should I text him? What do I say?
Let’s go with heyy with two y’s so I don’t seem too eager but show a little playfulness. Or is hii with two i’s better? Do people even use hello anymore or is that specifically reserved for Adele?

But it doesn’t really matter anyway because it takes him five hours to read the text with no response…and the god damn read receipts are taunting me. Until eight hours later I’m greeted with a “hi”… with one i. So you know how this goes… since it took him eight hours to answer now I have to wait until tomorrow night to respond.
Can’t be too available…

But maybe he wasn’t ignoring me? He could have been sleeping or working late, right?
Nevertheless, I’ve spent the last eight hours shuffling through the files in my brain for everything I could have done wrong to cause him to potentially ignore me. Why read it and not answer? Read receipts are meant for the unsaid: “I saw this and can’t answer” text or more frequently… the “I want you to know I read this and am purposefully not answering due to something you did” text. But what’s the point of those receipts anyway but to completely destroy the confidence of a girl who decided it was okay to text him first instead of wait anxiously to hear back from someone who probably doesn’t save your contact name with emojis anyway.
Everybody knows you’re nobody until somebody saves your name with a heart.

I’ve decided on again, off again that we’re over but we can’t be over because we never technically began.
“It’s just casual, you know?”
“We’re just friends”
“It’s complicated”
Or everyone’s favorite…
“I’m not looking for anything serious right now”
But what’s casual? Like jeans and a nice top? Or a drink with a co-worker you’ve never really liked that much? Casual like what you wore to that job interview you didn’t get?

Because that’s what dating is: A series of intense job interviews, questionnaires, strategically picked outfits and specific scenarios that allow the boss to make a full, in-depth decision on your status here at the company.
I’m sorry, but we’ve decided to go with another candidate.
(You’re not easy enough)
Or sometimes, you just never get a call back.
(You’ve just been ghosted)

We as a generation have realistically changed the face of cellular devices and their use. We have forced companies to make phone plans that again include minutes instead of unlimited calls because they aren’t making money on that usage point anymore. We have taken the concept of text messaging from an aid to cell phone calls to the only isolated form of communication we use. We have used applications and settings (like do not disturb) to discourage communication out of spite and neglect of others, not it’s intended purpose (like for when kids are in class or you’re in a meeting… even though that’s probably where you’re reading this now).

We have over complicated something meant to sub in for phone calls when we couldn’t speak, we stopped calling our families and friends. We get to know new loves through “20 questions”, and then can’t fight the sexual banter 5 questions in. We take naked photos of ourselves and send it instead of enticing them in person. We sell ourselves short when they hate movies we love, and support causes we hate, because having someone text you good morning is almost better than sleeping in on a rainy day off.

We think twice before saying anything that crosses our minds. We stopped being honest. We decide not to answer instead of risk the fuck up, and then realize that is the fuck up.

I can’t text you first because that shows I’m too interested. I can’t call you because that’s weird. I can’t have dinner without tagging myself at its location on Facebook. I can’t figure out if you’re busy or ignoring me. I can’t believe how often we use lol. I can’t figure out if heyyy with three y’s is annoying or a typo. I can’t tell if you didn’t see my selfie or you’re choosing not to like it.

But more importantly, I can’t believe we give this much of a fuck.

Cover Image Credit: MediaVenue

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Why I Spend So Much Time With My Boyfriend

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Many people think that spending too much time with your significant other is a bad thing. I think that wanting to spend time with them is a blessing. Don't get me wrong, we do not spend every waking minute together. We make sure that we save time for our friends and family, but in the end, we cherish our time together.

He brings out the best in me. When I first met my boyfriend, I knew he was something special. I didn't know what it was, but I knew that it would be important someday. I found out that when I am with him, I am an all-around happier person. I look at things in different ways, and I now know a whole new world of people. He has helped me overcome obstacles that have been holding me back for quite some time.

We enjoy each others company. I can't even begin to tell you how many times we have just sat in silence simply knowing that you are in the company of someone who loves you is comforting. He makes things that would usually be boring a lot more fun. When we do homework together, he makes the work seem like it's not work, and things like a simple trip to Walmart ends up being a comedy show.

We are best friends. Many people say that they are best friends with their significant other. For us, it's true. I can tell him anything. There is no hiding things in our relationship; we come right out and say what we want to say.

He pushes me to succeed. Whether it is with weight loss or homework, he holds me accountable. When I start a new workout, he keeps me on track to be whom I want to be. We make sure that we put homework before going out and that helps us in the long run. Giving up that pizza can be easy when you are spending time with someone you love.

He makes life seem not so hard. College can be hard and make life difficult. It seems that I always have something new happening or another meeting to attend. When I get stressed or overwhelmed, he makes sure that I take the time to put into perspective what really matters and focus on that. And when that fails, we go get McDonald's.

He supports me. He has never once told me that one of my ideas was stupid or out of reach. Whenever something new comes up that I think would be exciting, he is the first one to rally behind me and let me know that it is a good idea (even if it's not).

I love him. Love is a strong word, but I can honestly say I have never felt like this before. Between everything that he does for me, I do just as much for him simply because I love seeing him happy. Spending so much time together isn't hard to do because we love each other. If somewhere down the road we decide to split ways, I will still love him and he will still love me. That will never go away.

Cover Image Credit: Hanna Hartman

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Is Social Media Killing Romance?

In a modern era filled with technology, are the communication outlets we rely on destroying our ability to connect?


I have always been a girl that has been stereotypically obsessed with romance novels and movies. Honestly, I enjoy the concept of romance in and of itself. I have always dreamed of a passionate, deep romance of my own complete with a meet-cute, dates, and affection. However, it seems as though the concept of romance has skewed dramatically as social media continues to flourish.

So many romance movies are shifting to acknowledge how time-consuming social media is in teenagers lives. Even so, social media seems to be such a minuscule part of the relationships while, in reality, social media outlets tend to be a major form of communication in our society.

It seems as though our entire lives are digital and relationships are no exceptions. Meeting people the "old fashioned way" is almost obsolete now thanks to dating apps and other mediums of communication. We seem to be taking away the basis of relationships; intimacy and connection.

Additionally, social media has been detrimental, especially pertaining to self-esteem and self-image. Social media allow self-scrutinization to become the norm. Comparison is almost a reflex while scrolling through social media so why would romance and relationships be any different? Social media can create ridiculous expectations for relationships. Apps like Instagram are a media for sharing the best of your life, so everyone seems to have a perfect life on there. These expectations and comparisons seem to be a deteriorating factor for relationships.

Another phenomenon that I have noticed, thanks to social media, is that meeting people is easier than ever. This is not a bad thing per se. However, since it is so easy, it seems that all the effort is gone. Flirting with someone who "slid into your DMs" is exponentially easier than flirting with someone in real life. Apps like Snapchat, Twitter, and Instagram are simple methods to communicate and therefore, our communication has become simple.

Hookup culture is another thing that has become increasingly popular with the rise of social media. According to statistics, correlation does not imply causation but, at least to me, it seems that there are entirely too many aspects in common for them to not be related. Since communication is exponentially easier, so have "booty calls." Late night texts. or "snaps" have diminished the chase and allowed for actual relationships to be foreign to our generation.

In conclusion, social media has provided us with an unbelievable amount of benefits. However, it also may be draining our generation of connection and emotion. It seems as though social media has driven us into an age of simplicity and complacency.

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