#MeToo Is An Empowering Movement That Has Turned Into An Outlet For Guilt

#MeToo Is An Empowering Movement That Has Turned Into An Outlet For Guilt

There are times when sexual harassment is real, and there are times when it is not.
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Time's Up and #MeToo is the 2018 sexual harassment movement that is spreading like wildfire across the U.S. And for a good reason, too. After seeing others stand up for themselves, thousands of women who have kept silent about their violations decided to make the claim that some men have taken their testosterone-induced confidence a little too far. As a feminist and advocate for female empowerment, I highly support the courage of women to raise awareness of sexual harassment and the need for consent. But it angers me to see some women unlawfully blame their "abusers."

Women such as Halsey have had their lives turned upside down after being roughly handled by a man. Most of these women have overcome severe anxiety attacks, depression and suicide attempts. It is only right for them to find closure by bringing justice and addressing the man who believed that nothing was wrong.

It does sadden me to see men being accused of problems that should not exist in the first place. But it's also disappointing when women falsely claim to have been abused. Some women have actually been harassed or forced against their will, but others go through with certain acts and feel guilty about their actions afterward, finding solace by creating false accusations against genuinely innocent men.

"No" means no, but without firm verbal consent or disapproval, there exists a thin line between coercion and a two-sided agreement. Body language can be hard to pick up on, especially if it is not obvious. Hitting someone forcefully can easily be interpreted as hate, but staying in a stiff position or moving as little as possible are harder to pick up on, in certain scenarios. Same thing with facial expressions. What an uncomfortable grimace may look like to can be interpreted as a smile to others.

Therefore, verbally expressing your feelings is very important to establish open communication. But some women choose not to rely upon words and instead, tehy use unreliable context clues. And when they decide to "go with it anyway" and reflect upon it later, they feel guilty and violated and choose to categorize their discomfort under sexual harassment, when really, it was not.

Take for example the sexual misconduct filed against Aziz Ansari. Though he may have acted impulsively and inappropriately, Grace could have told him "no" and left his residence, instead of saying "chill out" or "later," and engaging with him. The way she spoke to him does not immediately signal her uneasiness, which is what could have created that disparity in communication. Though some of the blame rests with Ansari for the misconduct, Grace also deserves some partial blame for her lack of strong expression.

Sometimes, men do not communicate as clearly, leading to the same problem except in the opposite gender. Consent lives in the gray area unless it is crystal clear whether it exists or not. That's why it is in the best interest of adults to vocalize their inner emotions throughout their romantic encounters, or else, the results can end up not-so-romantic.

Sexual harassment is wrong. It is not acceptable to take advantage of someone when they are intoxicated or whether they do not want a person's advances. And naming the guilt over an uncomfortable one night stand that an individual voluntarily took part in should not be called sexual harassment.

Movements like these should not be an outlet for the guilt over a hookup. It is only for real cases of pressure over sexual relations. There is a difference between the two, and if we do not see that, then #MeToo could become a front used for those who wish to ignore their true feelings over a failed relationship.


Cover Image Credit: Unsplash

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To The Teacher Who Was So Much More

Thank you for everything
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I think it's fair to say that most people remember at least one teacher who had a lasting impact on them. I have been incredibly lucky to have several teachers who I will never forget, but one individual takes the cake. So here's to you: thank you for all you have done.

Thank you for teaching me lessons not just in the textbook.

Although you taught a great lecture, class was never just limited to the contents of the course. Debates and somewhat heated conversations would arise between classmates over politics and course material, and you always encouraged open discussion. You embraced the idea of always having an opinion, and always making it be heard, because why waste your voice? You taught me to fight for things I believed in, and to hold my ground in an argument. You taught me to always think of others before doing and speaking. You showed me the power of kindness. Thank you for all the important lessons that may not have been included in the curriculum.

Thank you for believing in me.

Especially in my senior year, you believed in me when other teachers didn't. You showed me just what I could accomplish with a positive and strong attitude. Your unwavering support kept me going, especially when I melted into a puddle of tears weekly in your office. You listened to my stupid complaints, understood my overwhelming stress-induced breakdowns, and told me it was going to be okay. Thank you for always being there for me.

Thank you for inspiring me.

You are the epitome of a role model. Not only are you intelligent and respected, but you have a heart of gold and emit beautiful light where ever you go. You showed me that service to others should not be looked at as a chore, but something to enjoy and find yourself in. And I have found myself in giving back to people, thanks to your spark. Thank you for showing me, and so many students, just how incredible one person can be.

Thank you for changing my life.

Without you, I truly would not be where I am today. As cliche as it sounds, you had such a remarkable impact on me and my outlook on life. Just about a year has passed since my graduation, and I'm grateful to still keep in touch. I hope you understand the impact you have made on me, and on so many other students. You are amazing, and I thank you for all you have done.

Cover Image Credit: Amy Aroune

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Time: An Odd Social Construct by Humans

Time is a mysterious and complex concept to understand, but my thought process says otherwise. Time is a flawed concept, and I'm here to tell you why.

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A physicists definition of time: "the progression of events from the past to the present and into the future. We all know the word; we use it daily for everything we do;, however, are we using it right? It's just something us humans composed to explain another oddity in the universe. There are days I wonder if time is an actual thing in the universe. Who invented it? Why did they invent it? Isn't it relative? What if it was all fake and we're telling the wrong time? These are questions I ask myself sometimes. You might be confused about where I'm going with this, so let me explain my speculations on time.

I was reading an article about the concept of time and was intrigued by its dictionary definition stated above. I understand the past was before it already happened, however, what about now? If it's a progression from the past to the present and into the future, aren't we always in the future? For example, you are reading this article right now, but every word you scan was going to happen; you knew the future before the present. This isn't on purpose, I promise!

I know that was short, so let me explain another. There are many ways to measure weight: years, months, weeks, days, hours, minutes, seconds, milliseconds, nanoseconds, etc.; but what if I told you this was all a lie? Every second you have been counting was fake; from the moment you wake up to the moment you sleep was different. You ate dinner at the wrong time, maybe it's not 4 p.m. at all. You never knew that could happen, did you? Time juxtaposes itself so much that even us humans couldn't figure the loose ends it holds.

There is this other fact about our brain and time you may know but not a whole lot. In our brain we have this gadget called the circadian rhythms, it is used as a clock in our body. That's why you sleep when it gets dark and wake up when the sun rises. Let me ask you one question: Has there a day or many days when your day seems to have gone by fast? I'm sure you answered "yes" because I sure have had my days gone by quickly here and there. This happens\u00a0because when an exciting event occurs to our body clock increases and vice versa. My question is, however, that if our circadian rhythms increase speed, shouldn't the time in reality also increase speed? Why is that our day can go by so fast, but, still, the time on the clock is the same? My speculation is that the time we're used to in the real world is wrong, and we should be following the time based on our body. When we get tired, that's when we go to sleep, and when our body says to wake up, that's when we should wake up.

Scientists say there was a beginning of time, and that was the era of the Big Bang Theory. However, isn't the BBT just a theory? As far as I know, a theory is a superstition or system of ideas. If time started during the BBT according to scientists, then time never started at all. We never proved the BBT ever happened, so\u00a0how can we prove that time began at that moment? To me, I don't think time ever existed until the dawn of humans or when the earth was formed; that's also your opinion to make on that case. That means that time never started or ended at any given point in history until the formation of humans on planet earth.

All in all, do I think time is a cool concept? Yes, I do. Is time complex? Oh my, probably the most complex thing I've seen so far! Do I think time is real? Not really, I think time is an illusion. Then again, this is all just my simple opinion that can go on for hours, if I had the "time" anyway.

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