The Metaphors In 'Zombieland'

The Metaphors In 'Zombieland'

Negativity is a virus.

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"Oh America. I wish I could tell you that this was still America. But I've come to realize you can't have a country without people. And there are no people here. No, my friends. This is now the United States of Zombieland."

All quotes taken from ZOMBIELAND (2009)

This bleak outlook in a post-apocalyptic world is a metaphor for where our country may be heading. Zombies are enraged, not alive, yet not dead, blood thirsty creatures. With no regard for accountability, they look to tear down anyone in their path with a pulse. Some real-life humans could be, and probably have been, described as enraged, not living, but not dead, blood thirsty creatures who, without acknowledgment of accountability, look to tear down anyone in their path with a pulse. Negativity is just another virus, passing from each infected victim to the next.

Zombieland follows its cowardly protagonist, Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg), as he navigates his way through the treachery that is now the United States of Zombieland. Flooded with ravenous, flesh-eating freaks, a few questionable survivors, and tons of laughs in between, Columbus explains how he has survived this long on his own. He strictly follows the rules. His rules.

RULE #1 | CARDIO

While Columbus explains you need to be fast to outrun the undead, a strong cardiovascular system also protects you in the metaphorical, real-life, Zombieland. Put simply; toxic people are stressful to deal with. If you deal with toxic people on a regular basis, that stress can start to affect your health. One of the best ways to deal with stress is exercise. Cardio melts fat and promotes heart health, readying you for anything Zombieland may throw your way.

RULE #2 | DOUBLE TAP

"…As the infection spread and the chaos grew, it wasn't enough to just be fast on your feet. You had to get a gun and learn how to use it. Which leads me to my second rule, the double tap. In those moments when you're not sure the undead are really dead-dead, don't get all stingy with your bullets." While staying healthy is a great stress deterrent, you need also to learn how to defend yourself against toxic people. When you get that fight or flight sensation, sometimes flight is not an option. Kill your doubt, double tap it when necessary, and stand up for yourself.

RULE #3 | BEWARE OF BATHROOMS

"It wasn't long before the zombies began to get clever. When you're at your most vulnerable, somehow they could just smell it. Don't let them catch you with your pants down." Toxic people go for the jugular. If they know you're insecure about something, they'll likely think of clever some way to exploit it. As you should beware of bathrooms in Zombieland, beware of this vulnerability tactic. Don't let them catch you with your pants down.

RULE #4 | SEATBELTS

"When zombies began to outnumber humans, well that's when you had to cut loose of all emotional ties. If the girls in your neighborhood are now fucked up little monsters, well maybe it's time to stop driving carpool. You had to focus on your own survival, which leads to rule number four… Fasten your seatbelts. It's gonna' be a bumpy ride." If you're surrounded by, what seems to be, a bunch of zombies, it may be time to turn a new page in your life. Prepare yourself, brace yourself, and buckle your seatbelt; It's gonna' be a bumpy ride. (But it's worth it).


Bill is a 31-year-old writer/game developer from Boston, Massachusetts. He's a content creator in Southern New Hampshire University's Odyssey community, a member of the National Society of Leadership and Success, and is wrapping up his Game Development program in October 2018. With an Associate's in Liberal Arts and a forthcoming BS in Game Development, he is ready to excel in the gaming industry. Outside of work, Bill can be found supporting local bands in the greater Boston area.
Cover Image Credit:

https://www.flickr.com/photos/loadmagazine/3992350926

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Everything You Will Miss If You Commit Suicide

The world needs you.
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You won’t see the sunrise or have your favorite breakfast in the morning.

Instead, your family will mourn the sunrise because it means another day without you.

You will never stay up late talking to your friends or have a bonfire on a summer night.

You won’t laugh until you cry again, or dance around and be silly.

You won’t go on another adventure. You won't drive around under the moonlight and stars.

They’ll miss you. They’ll cry.

You won’t fight with your siblings only to make up minutes later and laugh about it.

You won’t get to interrogate your sister's fiancé when the time comes.

You won’t be there to wipe away your mother’s tears when she finds out that you’re gone.

You won’t be able to hug the ones that love you while they’re waiting to wake up from the nightmare that had become their reality.

You won’t be at your grandparents funeral, speaking about the good things they did in their life.

Instead, they will be at yours.

You won’t find your purpose in life, the love of your life, get married or raise a family.

You won’t celebrate another Christmas, Easter or birthday.

You won’t turn another year older.

You will never see the places you’ve always dreamed of seeing.

You will not allow yourself the opportunity to get help.

This will be the last sunset you see.

You’ll never see the sky change from a bright blue to purples, pinks, oranges and yellows meshing together over the landscape again.

If the light has left your eyes and all you see is the darkness, know that it can get better. Let yourself get better.

This is what you will miss if you leave the world today.

This is who will care about you when you are gone.

You can change lives. But I hope it’s not at the expense of yours.

We care. People care.

Don’t let today be the end.

You don’t have to live forever sad. You can be happy. It’s not wrong to ask for help.

Thank you for staying. Thank you for fighting.

Suicide is a real problem that no one wants to talk about. I’m sure you’re no different. But we need to talk about it. There is no difference between being suicidal and committing suicide. If someone tells you they want to kill themselves, do not think they won’t do it. Do not just tell them, “Oh you’ll be fine.” Because when they aren’t, you will wonder what you could have done to help. Sit with them however long you need to and tell them it will get better. Talk to them about their problems and tell them there is help. Be the help. Get them assistance. Remind them of all the things they will miss in life.

For help, call 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

Cover Image Credit: Brittani Norman

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​The Motivation To Get Back To The Gym Only Comes From Yourself, Not Online Fitness Influencers

After a long winter break, are you ready to get back to grinding?

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My winter break was filled with time spent with friends, family, working, and of course, eating lots of food!

Too much food to be completely honest. My holiday food baby is still kicking with late night cravings, and endless amounts of french fries that I absolutely DO NOT need to keep consuming from different restaurants.

My latest excuse from bringing myself to the gym is from being too tired- although I work incredibly late (till around 2 A.M almost every night) I can't help but feel drained and empty the next morning to get myself up, and run 2 miles on the treadmill. It just doesn't make sense to me why I would do such a thing when my body is clearly over-exhausted from late nights at work.

Getting to the gym is like a mind game- you wanna go and get back into shape, but you feel restricted when you haven't been there in approximately 9 years. You have to get in the car that's freezing, walk into the gym filled with people who are in much better shape than you are, and find some way to get yourself motivated to get back on the grind you used to know and love before the holidays started.

Working out in this society is something many post about on social media, especially influencers. Fitness guru's flood Instagram and YouTube with the latest workout routines, as well as show off their "bikini body" and their body progress. This can easily make women who are not consistently going to the gym or eating health feel bad about themselves because they may not have the same body figure. Although it could be motivating to see others working out online, it could also be damaging to one's mental health when they don't have the same level of motivation or body figure.

It all comes down to your mindset and attitude about working out!

Sitting in bed waiting for yourself to just go back to the gym and pick up from where you left off isn't going to make the process any easier. Relaxation mode is completely different than the grinding mode, people! If you want something to change, whether it is to lose weight or just to tone certain parts of your body, it won't happen unless you put effort to do so. This means your body, but also your mind needs to be ready to make that change. If you are in the mindset that you want to sit back and relax, there is no doubt that you wouldn't have a good work out because the entire time you are tirelessly running or lifting, you would be wishing you were home in bed doing nothing.

Your mind needs to be equally as prepared to set goals for yourself in the weight room.

The best ways to motivate yourself to get back to the gym are pretty simple- changing your diet by including healthier options could help, drinking lots of water, and even putting on a pair of work-out leggings could put you in the mindset to get back to the gym. As long as you are working out to better yourself physically and mentally, and not comparing your body type to others on social media, you will feel more positive and get a better work out in rather than feeling the need to compete with others.

Working out regularly is about self-growth- it's about doing what you can to see the changes you want to make with your life. It won't happen overnight, but it is possible! It is finally 2019; a new year filled with new beginnings. Put yourself out there, get motivated, and do what you can to live a healthier lifestyle.

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