While scrolling through Twitter, I came across an article from Pennsylvania that the Odyssey had retweeted headlined "Why I don't plan on getting married in my twenties". I'll be honest, when I first saw this article I was pretty upset. Last July, at just 18, I married my Best Friend. I've learned to deal with the constant criticism from close friends and even family, but sometimes it still gets to me. Then I realized what a boring world it would be if we all thought the same way! This girl, stranger actually, doesn't plan on getting married anytime soon and that's great. I know women who don't get married until their 45, however, she expressed why she felt this way so I feel that I should do the same.
1: She wants to live her life
I totally get this one. I want "me time" all the time, and sometimes I just have to tell Jared to leave me alone. I still believe that I have lived my life much fuller since I have married him, though. Before I met Jared, I had traveled to three states; Mississippi, Florida, and Tennessee. I was just a small town girl who was terrified of heights and anyone who didn't think like me. Since I've met Jared, I have been to the Dominican Republic, rode a horse on a beach, went scuba diving, and I have been to the Opryland Mall at Christmas time. We are currently planning a Ski Trip in March. I would have never done any of these things if it wasn't for him, and I know I am blessed for it. So like you said, I also want to travel the world and see new places, I just want him to be there with me holding my hand while I do it.
2: She is "Fiercely Independent"
I am definitely not independent. Although I love to say that "I don't need no man", I kinda do. Well, I at least want him. I've always been dependent on someone, even as a baby I cried unless I was being held. That's just who I am as a person. However, in the article, it mentions having a job for this reason. I have a job, and a husband so I guess I just got the best of both worlds.
3: She can't take care of herself
I can also agree with this. Let's go back to the whole wants to be held as a baby that I mentioned earlier. I've lost a phone, wrecked my car 5 times, and I have about $3 to my name at the moment. I shouldn't be allowed to be an adult. Jared actually helps with this. He's the one constantly reminding me to pick up my cereal bowls and to do my laundry, but maybe Jared is just a great person who takes care of me instead of me taking care of him.
4: She hasn't found anyone yet
This is a valid reason! There is absolutely no reason to get married unless you are head over heels for someone. I never planned on being married at 18, and if you ask anyone who knew me they wouldn't have ever thought that I would be the first to be married. My longest relationship was 2 years, and I was 15. When Jared asked me to marry him, I didn't even hesitate. I just knew. Even now with the fights and the criticism, I don't regret it. Marrying the wrong person only leads to divorce, which I would never encourage.
5: She has the rest of her life to get married
Again, valid reason but this shouldn't be used as an excuse NOT to get married. Imagine doing this with other things such as "I have the rest of my life to go skydiving". Well, yes but why put it off if you have found the one?
She ends the article by mentioning friends that are engaged and that she is super happy for them, so I thought I would do the same. I do know amazing girls that have been with their boyfriends for years who just don't want to get married yet. I didn't write this article to condemn her or anyone else, I simply wrote it to let my voice be heard. As I said, the world would be such a boring place if we all had the same opinions! So to the women who are happily a wife and a college student, you go girl, and to the girl who is living it up on her own, keep doing you! With that, I'll end with one of my favorite quotes:
"Men are so worried that marriage will leave them with “only one woman” for the rest of their lives. That’s simply not true. I fell in love with a 19-year-old rock climber, married a 20-year-old animal lover, started a family with a 24-year-old mother, then built a farm with a 25-year-old homemaker, and today I’m married to a 27-year-old woman of wisdom. If your mind is healthy, you’ll never get tired of “one woman”. You’ll actually become overwhelmed with how many beautiful versions of her you get to marry over the years. Don’t say no to marriage, say yes and keep saying yes until the day you die. " - Dale Partridge
