March Madness starts this week and with it comes thousands of people filling out brackets in hopes of getting as many points as possible. While sports fanatics everywhere tend to choose based on watching season play, the best players on the team and a firm understanding of the teams, the fact that nobody has ever achieved a perfect bracket AND the fact that random choices typically do pretty well, proves that maybe that isn't the way to go.
If you're trying to figure out the best way to fill out your bracket that is guaranteed to be just as average as everyone else's, give these ideas a try.
1. Alphabetically by the second letter of the head coach's last name
UMBC's head coach's last name is Odom, Virginia's head coach's last name is Bennett. D comes before E, so UMBC moves on. (Is this a great start, as UMBC is #16 and Virginia is #1? No. But trust the process.)
2. The day that their tallest player was born
Jacob Epperson of Creighton is 6'11" and was born on May 25.
James Love III of Kansas State is 6'11" and was born on February 4.
25 > 4, so Creighton wins.
3. The team's hottest player's jersey number
Obviously, this one is objective and totally up to you. Look at some team photos, pick the most attractive and go from there.
4. Which university's [insert major here] program is ranked the highest nationally
Pick your major, and find where they are ranked for that major nationally. Basically, you're just cheering for your future career.
5. Whichever school's acceptance rate is lower
Kentucky's acceptance rate is 72.2, and Davidson's is only a mere 20.1. More competitive in the classroom, more competitive on the court? We'll see.
6. Whose mascot would win in a physical altercation
Would Ohio State's Buckeye or South Dakota State's Jackrabbit win in a physical fight? It is up to you.
7. The last letter the lowest jersey number's first name
Houston's #1 jersey number is Chris Harris Jr., clocking in with an S.
San Diego State #0 is Devin Watson, bringing an N to the game.
N comes before S, so San Diego State would take this one.
8. Which team colors you would rather have as your wedding colors
Again, this one is totally objective. Looking at North Carolina vs. Lipscomb... Would you rather get married with blue, silver, and white as your theme or purple and yellow?
9. How many wins their school's football team had this season
West Virginia's football team was 7-6, whereas Murray State only brought home 3 W's, so we are sending West Virginia to the next game.
10. How many Instagram followers their highest jersey number has
Marshall's #50, Milan Mijovic, has 983 followers on Instagram.
Connor Frankamp of Witchita State has 8,366.
Wichita State wins this one.
11. The number of players on their women's basketball team that are taller than the shortest member of their men's basketball team
Butler's women's basketball team has seven women taller than Cambell Donovan who is 5'11. However, the 5'10 Jonathan Holmes from Arkansas is shorter than eight women from Arkansas' team, so the Razorbacks take this one.
12. Add up the last 4 digits of the player who weighs the most's high school phone number. Highest wins.
(For the people who want to go EXTRA random.)
Auburn's biggest man, Austin Wiley, clocks in at 260 and 6'11". He attended Calusa Prep, who's phone number ends in 3787. Add those up and get 25.
Charleston's Nick Harris is 260lbs as well, attending St. Pius X Catholic. Their phone number ends in 3023, only adding up to 8.
So, Auburn would get to head to the next game.
13. How close (in miles) the University's basketball court is to where you are sitting right now
This depends on where you are. I am near Columbus, OH right now.
Rhode Island's Ryan Center is 703 miles away (with tolls).
Oklahoma's Lloyd Noble Center is 956 miles away.
This makes Rhode Island's court closer, so they get to move on.
14. The salary of their University's president (or highest executive)
Seton Hall's previous president, A. Gabriel Esteban, was raking in $525,716 per year. (Salary for their current interim president is not available.)
Randy Woodson, North Carolina State's chancellor, receives $632,810 annually, so we will see NC State in the next game.
15. By the seed number
If you're lazy and uninterested in looking up phone numbers of player's former high schools or checking their Instagram followers, you could always just go by who's seed number is the lowest and be boring like everyone else.