A young, growing girl shouldn't have to avoid sleep in fear of waking up with you beside her bed, touching her inappropriately. You were supposed to protect her from the monsters in her closet, but her monster was the one in the next room over. Her monster was you.
My mother was reaped of her childhood because of you. An adolescent girl should feel safe in the warmth of her father's arms. My mother barricaded herself in her room to hide from your touch. She was just a little girl who had to fend for herself; a little girl who had to grow up a little too quickly.
Emma Piccinini
When a woman finds out that she is having a baby girl, she should want to share the exciting news with her father, instead, my mother hid me from you. She served as my barricade since she had none other than a wooden bureau in front of her door when she was younger.
She had never known the kind of love she deserved, so as she raised her children, she found herself in a broken, toxic marriage. Her nightmare of a past crept in on her, so she relied on my father for safety by letting him define who she was.
She felt shame for what she went through. She placed blame on herself. She felt blame for carrying the weight of her childhood on her shoulders, with lack of help to carry it. She was the victim, but she felt at fault.
Emma Piccinini
As she aged, watching her children grow, she found herself in the destruction of her past. She shattered the glass bubble she floated in throughout her life and took charge of her identity. She paved a path to the life she wanted to live.
When a father passes away, his children are supposed to mourn his death. His children are supposed to miss him. My mother breathed a sigh of relief at the news of your last breath. Even though she did not owe it to you, she still went to your funeral.
Emma Piccinini
Now that you are no longer in her life, my mother is no longer afraid of her past. At night, she sleeps soundly. She keeps her bedroom door unlocked. She strides through life. She lives in peace. She has found her safety. And it will never be within you.
She is stronger than you. She is bigger than you. She is more human than you.
She is my hero.
