According to the Urban Dictionary, Love is defined as "The most spectacular, indescribable, deep euphoric feeling for someone.
Love is an incredibly powerful word. When you're in love, you always want to be together, and when you're not, you're thinking about being together because you need that person and without them your life is incomplete."
So, why would a girl be afraid to be in love when it's defined as something so spectacular? Well, in every relationship that she was in, she gave everything. She was willing to go above and beyond to make them happy and put their own needs before hers. She had her bad days when everything felt like it was crashing down and she questioned every thing. But then there where the days when she was her happy care-free self. She rose above the challenges and overcame obstacles.
Yet somehow it was always never enough.
She would give her heart and soul to a dying relationship that could not be saved, even when she was optimistic that it could be. She soon realized, that as much as she loved someone, it was impossible to love someone into loving her. As much as she wanted to hold onto someone, people changed and left.
She's wary in letting you into her life because she's scared of commitment and she's constantly worried about losing you. In such a short amount of time, she's fearful you've grown into someone important to her. Once she has you, she has everything to lose. She's scared that once you know her real self, soul and all, you may change your mind about her. She hopes you can understand that shes only feeling this way after going through what she did.
She has every right to be wary considering how she has always tried her best and somehow it isn't enough. She has experienced how quickly a blossoming love can turn to ash, how people can change during the most trying times and seen their true colors. She's even witnessed how the strongest of love could not hold against the test of time and she's not sure if you and her can be the exception.
She is terrified of loving you because she's afraid you are going to break her heart. It took a long time to get over her broken heart and to be where she is today. Which is why she is not going to give her heart away easily or waste her time on casual relationships that never lead anywhere and she is damn sure not going to change herself in the hopes of getting someone to change their mind about her.
She promises to only get into a relationship if that is what she wants and is certain of. She promises to do things differently this time around.
She wants to fall in love with her eyes wide open and wants to know exactly what she is getting into when she makes the choice to be with you. She wants you to know everything about her because she wants to know that she is what you've been searching for. She is not easy to love, and she apologizes for it.
If you are willing to be patient with her and continue to love her and show her how you are not going anywhere, she promises you the same and nothing less.
She promises to stop being afraid to love you with her whole heart.
