Earlier this week, a young man in my community passed away after battling the very serious condition that a car accident left him in. He died very soon before his 17th birthday. Amidst my heart being utterly broken for his family, feelings of loss that resulted from losing my own brother in a car accident almost five years ago are resurfacing. I see the Facebook posts, I hear people quietly talking about how sad it is, or how much they will miss him. I did not know him, but many of my friends are greatly hurt by his death. The whispers of "he died way too young" and "I've never really thought about death until now" and "I can't imagine what his family is going through" fill my ears and bring back memories that I wish I could bury.

Most people that know me know about my brother and what happened. I was 15 when the police officers came to our house early in the morning to deliver news of a fatal crash that will never cease shaping me and affecting me. It was hard, I was angry at the Lord and I didn't understand why things happen when and how they happen. Then I learned very valuable lessons through this great pain, and I was able to grow through the hurt.

Those are the things that I disclose a lot. How the deaths that have occurred in my life over the past five years have taught me so many important lessons, how I have grown closer to myself and to the Lord. This isn't bad, to be sure. It's good to look at the positives and to focus on those. To not use your hard times to knock others down but to lift them up. But sometimes I feel convicted by the fact that I don't even acknowledge, sometimes even to myself, that I am still hurt, and that I have a pain that is never going to go away. The hurt diminishes for the majority of the time, but it's still there.

This hurt was reignited at my hearing the news of this young man's death. An overwhelming rush of memories came over me, and I was once again 15, sitting at my kitchen table, questioning everything that I knew as fact. In that moment, I realized how many times I see my brother's picture in my house, or how often I tell a story of a situation that he was involved in. I then understood that I miss him every day, all the time. Not a day goes by that I don't have a pang hit my heart that reminds me I won't see my big brother again on this earth. It broke my heart to realize that another family will be going through something shockingly similar to my own family's hurt, to realize that yet again, it looks as though nothing good can come out of darkness.

But, I am also encouraged.

I am encouraged to witness a family (that I don't even know) handle pain with such grace, with faith in our good, good Father. Faith that His will is being done, that even in times of struggle, He will triumph. It's such a beautiful thing to see loss handled with the joy of the Lord. It still hurts, you still grieve, but you can grieve with the hope that this is not the end. With the hope that the friends and family who have passed away are in the presence of the One who created them, and they are FULFILLED.

For those going through a time of great loss, know this: If you know Jesus, run to Him, because He is the only One that can take something terrible and make it beautiful. If you do not know Jesus, call out to Him. Plead for Him to reveal His love and grace to you because with His presence, any broken heart can be made whole.

I hated whenever people would say to me, "God has a plan." We never want to hear it, but it is true! He has had the entire plan for humanity since the foundation of the world and we are a part of it! Let us embrace that fact, and welcome his plan for our lives with open minds, having faith that even when it seems as if nothing good can arise from a situation, HE will be glorified, and we will be blessed.