With the first semester of sophomore year coming to an end, it has suddenly hit me that time is really, seriously, frighteningly flying by. That being said, I've found myself looking back to last year quite frequently, and realizing that I took all of it for granted while it was here. Yes, you heard me. I genuinely miss experiencing this campus, and these people, and college in general, for the first time. Freshman year certainly had its ups and downs, and I'm sure everyone can say the same, but to me, regardless of the bullsh*t that came with the first year of college, the positives definitely outweigh the negatives, and when I reflect on the year behind me, it is always those positives that come to mind.

I came into freshman year shy and nervous, and I left freshman year confident, much more extroverted, and sad to be leaving.I can attribute this change in my personality to several things, but most of all I can attribute it to the wonderful, incredible people who came into my life during the course of that year.

Take my freshman year roommate, and all of my first Fordham friends, for example. I was so incredibly fortunate to be surrounded by these loving, crazy (in the best way), and supportive people, and I have always considered myself so lucky to have walked onto campus for the very first time and found myself surrounded by people who brought out qualities in me that I had always wished I'd had. Being around this extroverted group of people brought out the same in me. It certainly took time, but spending time around them helped me grow into someone who was much more comfortable around other people, especially considering how immensely introverted I had been prior. Throughout high school, I had considered myself to be kind of awkward in new social settings, and I almost always found myself experiencing anxiety at the thought of ending up in a new social setting with people whom I had never met.

Now, meeting new people and making new friends is something I truly look forward to, and I can't believe how much I have grown in this aspect. I now constantly do my best to talk to anyone and everyone, and I no longer confine myself to the weird ideology that if I've never talked to someone before, now isn't the time to start. I used to find myself scrolling through social media, for example, and wanting to leave a comment on something but stopping myself from doing so because it would "be weird since we aren't really friends". If this sounds wrong to you, it's because it is. Unexpected compliments in any form are something I think every single one of us appreciates, and honestly? Who doesn't love having a couple comments stack up on their latest post?

First and second semester of freshman year are each so incredibly special to me in their own right. The first semester brought me the wonderful group of friends with whom I remained for the rest of the year, and it also brought me the orientation group that introduced me to my now best friend and roommate who is like a sister to me.

It also brought me a few people who didn't stick around, and though it sucked at the time, I am now so, so grateful that it happened the way it did. Everything we go through is a learning and growing experience, and I definitely both grew and learned as a result of this struggle.

The second semester brought me a whole new group of crazy (still in the best way) and loving people, and I genuinely could not believe how lucky I was to have found myself surrounded by that many amazing friends. The second semester brought me some of the best experiences of my life and definitely brought me out of my shell in a whole new way. When I first received a text about joining an intramural soccer team, I thought no way. I have never been much of an athlete, and I considered myself (and still consider myself) uncoordinated to a certain degree (and I am laughing while typing this).

Guess what? I joined, along with two of my best friends (hi ladies), and we had the time of our lives with the amazing group of people we played those games with. I may not have been good at it, and I definitely really wasn't good at it, and I know my team can back me up on that. However, that intramural soccer team brought me some of the greatest people who are still in my life right now and I love them to pieces. I can't imagine what things would be like if I'd said no because those friends are some of whom I am truly so grateful for. I was always laughing around them, and I am still always laughing when I am around them.

Freshman year isn't only about all of the things that went right, though. It's also about the mistakes and the choices made that could have, or should have, been executed differently. I learned a lot about myself freshman year, and not all of it was positive. I was forced to recognize certain fatal flaws in myself and I spent this past summer working past these traits that I considered to be flaws. When I first recognized these, it was a terrible thing to experience, but it ultimately made me a stronger and happier person, because I worked to overcome these imperfections. They were not only holding me back but also negatively affecting certain people around me and I knew I would be a much healthier person if I chose to focus on self-improvement.

On a more light-hearted note, there were also mistakes such as putting off assignments because something fun and interesting presented itself. As a freshman, I took full advantage of every single opportunity I had to go out and have fun with my friends, and it's not that I regret this (at all), but I definitely began to confuse my priorities, and I was ignoring the fact that I know I thrive when I am in a state of productivity. By depriving myself of countless chances to be productive in this way, I was frequently left feeling drained (gee I wonder why) and unmotivated. This year, however, I have found a balance between going out and getting sh*t done, and this is easily the healthiest I have ever been, both mentally and physically.

When it comes down to it, I owe my freshman year a huge thank you, so..

Dear Freshman Year,

Thank you for the laughs. Thank you for the loves. Thank you for the lessons which sometimes came with bruised knees. Thank you for the best friends, and the ex-friends, and those that fell somewhere in between.

Thank you for letting me start over right when I needed to, and thank you for giving me the best new start I could have asked for.