Dear "The Blair Witch Project",
You will not read this letter, you are a movie. Movies do not have the capability to read (yet). Even though you can never read this and I really shouldn't be addressing you as "you" because you are, once again, a movie not a person, I need to fully express my love and gratitude for you.
Let's take it back to April 2013. I was a sophomore in high school. I was full swing into my love for movies, but I was trapped in a world of film elitism. If it was indie or prestigious I wanted nothing to do with it. Then you came into my life, the first horror film I willingly watched. I picked you up off the shelf in the favorites section at Family Video because I'd heard so much about you. For those reading this intimate and personal letter I am writing to a non sentient motion picture, let me explain the reputation of "The Blair Witch Project". Released in 1999, "The Blair Witch Project" is a horror film telling the story of a college documentary crew filming a movie about the urban legend of the Blair Witch, a mysterious force living in the nearby woods. Turns out the witch isn't too happy that these pesky kids are on her turf; chaos ensues. So what's the big deal, right? Here's where it gets interesting. The movie is shot in found footage style, meaning it is meant to seem like it is a real story and the movie is made of actual footage FOUND by police or real people. 1980 adventure flick Cannibal Holocaust was the first to do this (the filmmakers did it so well they were arrested because people thought the actors had actually been murdered!), but "The Blair Witch Project" popularized the filming style into a horror subgenre. Why? Because people believed it was real. People left the theater actually believing they'd seen the demise of three kids. Thats impressive. Now back to my gushy confession of love.
When I watched you, "The Blair Witch Project", I was really horrified. You managed to scare the living shit out of me and I loved every second of it. I enjoyed a horror movie for the first time, I realized maybe horror wasn't a dirty genre. As time went on, I explored more horror movies. My gross elitism mostly disappeared. I found that horror movies and spooky things in general made me really happy. I made friends who shared my newfound interests. You've made me me, "The Blair Witch Project".
Fast forward to this year when I got a text from my boyfriend (who I started talking to because we had similar movie interests, I got you to thank for my love life too). "Did you see this?!" he says, accompanied with a poster for a movie called "Blair Witch". I tense up. My heart rate increases. I jump over to IMDb and see that Adam Wingard's upcoming found footage movie "The Woods" isn't "The Woods" at all. It's a new YOU. A sequel to you, "The Blair Witch Project", directed by one of my favorite horror directors. I almost cried. I am clearly beyond excited to see your baby or sibling or whatever "Blair Witch" is in relation to you.
So I guess what all this means is that I love you so very much, "The Blair Witch Project". I love you so much I felt the need to write it out to you even though you cannot and will never be able to read it because you are, for the third time, a movie. I hope my mom doesn't get too many worried phone calls from my relatives asking if I'm ok because I'm talking to movies now. I hope my friends let me live this down (they won't). Thanks for existing, thanks for paving the way for some great found footage movies, no thanks for paving the way for some really bad found footage movies. Tell your directors I wish they'd make more movies so I can write more letters to more movies.
That's all for now, "The Blair Witch Project".
Love,
Courtney M. Cheshire
P.S.: I am not crazy for writing a letter to a movie.
