Dear Frat Cooler,
I can honestly say there is nothing more important to me than you. We've spent so much time together over the past few weeks, and I have to admit I have become extremely attached to you. Since we met, I have spent more time with you than I have with my closest friends, in class, or with my homework. And although I have lashed out in frustration toward you, you still are very dear to me.
Some may say that spending nearly a hundred dollars on a cooler is careless and a waste of money. But they don't understand. I may have less than twenty dollars in my bank account, but I would spend every last cent on you. I know the care you need: a sander, primer, spray paints, paint pens, glitter, tape, brushes. I would buy you a million shades of paint if you wanted.
Cooler, I just wanted to apologize again for trying to free hand that Budweiser label on your top. I should have listened when everyone told me it would be too difficult for someone who isn't artistic, like me, to draw… and while we are on an apologetic note I also want to say sorry for riddling your sides with horrible frat-tastic phrases like, “Frat hard. Frat often," and “Dressed up to get messed up." Although in my defense, I dressed you in some memos of encouragement as well.
But the best thing about you is that you know it's not what's on the outside that matters. It's what's on the inside that really counts. You are always able to make people look past appearances and dig deeper [for another beer]. You are truly the life of the party. Everyone automatically has a good time when you're in the room. You just make everything better. You've made me see that there is no need to stress over little things. I may have lost my phone, and someone may have thrown up on my shoes, but then I would just look at you and everything would be ok.
But loving so many things about you just made it that much harder to watch you go through so much pain. You were tossed around, lost paint, among other damages… It was truthfully one of the worst things I have ever witnessed—watching you go through such agony. But in the end, I suppose the demise of our relationship was inevitable. Leaving you behind on that beach was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. I wish we could've shared just one more day with each other. They say you never forget your first; well, I promise I will never forget you and the amazing times we had. I love you, and no matter how many coolers I make, you will always hold a special place in my heart.
Sincerely yours,
Kelleen
