A few years ago, I thought I was in love beyond measure. I truly thought that the feelings my boyfriend and I shared were genuine and that not a single person could understand them. Sure, he would make me feel unintelligent, embarrass me in public, argue with me frequently, and distrusted me greatly, but my excuse for all this at the time was that we were in love. We would always make up after fights, so our feelings were strong and real, right? Wrong. Real love shouldn’t make you feel like you’re constantly walking on eggshells, waiting for the next outburst or argument. Real love doesn’t involve one person being superior to the other, and real love definitely doesn’t hurt.
So many girls today are in unhealthy relationships, and it absolutely kills me to watch it happen, because I know exactly how it feels. Many people believe their love is genuine, and shouldn’t be inspected any further. To put it plainly, real love is selfless like the love that God has for us. This is outlined perfectly in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7:
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
Think about your relationship, and whether it encompasses selfless love or not. The very first thing mentioned in this verse is that love is patient. Is your boyfriend patient, allowing you to make mistakes without coming down hard on you? You should never live in fear that your next accident or problem will result in him leaving. He should bear with your imperfections, faults, and differences, instead of being intolerant of them. Is your boyfriend’s love kind? A kind person seeks out needs and looks for opportunities to meet those needs without repayment. He should be tender and forgiving when you or others have wronged him. Is your relationship full of envy? A jealous boyfriend needs to have all the attention in the relationship and refuses to acknowledge your success. He has no trust in his girlfriend, even if there is no reason not to. Your boyfriend should be a huge source of support, and he should never drag you down. Does your relationship dishonor you and everyone around you? Real love does not needlessly offend, and it is sensitive to the feelings of others. It is courteous, polite, and always uses tact. Does your boyfriend keep a record of all your wrongs to use against you? Genuine love shouldn’t keep a tally of wrongs to try to gain the upper hand by reminding the other person of past problems. Love forgives. On the other hand, your boyfriend’s love should rejoice in the truth. Real love will sensitively confront problems because it cares deeply and knows that it will be for the better of your relationship.
If you and your boyfriend’s love for each other is sincere, it will always have trust, honesty, protection, thoughtfulness, and will endure and thrive through problems. Real love is something that will leave you with feelings of joy and optimism. We are not perfect beings by any means, so our love isn’t either. God knows this, and he provides us with these verses so that we can love as truly and selflessly as He does.
