You know, I absolutely understand why people hate Valentine’s Day. I know that every day of the year should be a day to express your love. I get it.
But, I can’t deny that Valentine’s Day starts the conversation about love. And it’s a conversation that’s so important. Why not have a yearly reminder that we have to let the people in our lives know that, down to the smallest details, they are the ones that matter?
And in the midst of “hook-up culture” and where apps like Tindr exist, I took it upon myself to ask the people around me what their definitions of “love” is.
I received a lot more answers than I thought I would. So much so that I had to break this experiment up into two parts. (The second part of which you can view next week!)
Some of these definitions were very solemn. I’ve learned with love, comes hope for a better, brighter version of ourselves.
Some of them were humorous, and I appreciate them all the same because in addition to hope, with love comes pain, and it’s okay to laugh it off.
And some of them were just, simply beautiful. And I feel the need to share it.
So here goes. The first phase of my journey. Here is "Love" as told by Millenials.
“Love is stupid.”
That was the very first one I was sent. And it made me laugh because that’s instinctively where our mind goes when we think of it. How difficult love is, how mysterious and elusive it is, we tend to think of its “suckiness” first.
“Love is the burnt sh*t at the bottom of the toaster.”
Not quite sure what this one meant, but take it as you will.
Actually a lot of my first entries were rather humorous. I feel like maybe people our age can’t help but laugh about love and that’s honestly great.
“Love is the way Luke looked at Leia before they realized they were siblings.”
It warmed my heart to see people view love through friendship.
“It’s the little things like my best friend comes into my house without even knocking or I know to give her my leftover food without even asking her if she wants it because I know she does lol.”
Finding love in all forms in our life can make us feel infinitely less lonely. Our life feels more full and rich when we can appreciate that love has different faces rather than “boyfriend” or “girlfriend”.
“I think true love is when someone sends me heartfelt messages when I feel sh*tty about myself and I don’t even have to tell them that I feel sh*tty about myself because they just know I feel sh*tty about myself and it’s just really, really, really comforting that someone in this world thinks I’m not sh*tty lol idk.”
There is a sense of comfort that we receive, and it’s completely unique in itself. Even those who are able to self-motivate everyday can falter sometimes. And this empowerment that we get from real support can’t be replicated.
“Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” John 15:13
I found this one particularly interesting and humbling. Some of us find love in scripture, finding love in greater beings than ourselves. This is a love that makes people feel saved. This love gives people reason to believe.
“Love is when Sora reaches out to Kairi in Kingdom Hearts and ‘til this day he’s still lookin’ for her.”
Some people find love through art or creation or story and it’s wildly special. Artists can see the grand importance in their work when it becomes associated with bigger parts of life such as this. A product of their imagination helped someone reach clarity.
“...no matter what argument I have gotten with my family one way or another when it comes down to it I'd do almost anything for them because they are family and there are no replacements.”
-Ben C Lin.
We find love in family, in our blood. Our life literally begins from an act of love.
“When you’re taking a nap and he comes in thinking you are completely asleep and tucks the blanket around you before giving you a kiss on the cheek and leaving so you have peace and quiet.”
We find love in small gestures.
“Love is doing things you normally wouldn’t do without expecting anything in return like driving to the gym at 7AM because your best friend left her favorite necklace there the night before.”
We find love in sacrifice, whether big or small. It’s a silent agreement in trust and care.
“Love is knowing, accepting, and understanding the flaws of someone and realizing that while the good times bring you close, the bad times bring you closer.”
We find love in being welcomed into the heart and the life of another. That we have been brought to the other side and able to move forward because of another. Because of you, I did not give up. Because of you, I succeeded.
“Love is effort, love is the willingness to support and care for without judgement. Love is unconditional. To care for someone else’s happiness more than your own.”
No matter who you are, or what you’ve done, someone loves you for it. They love you as you are and it is enduring.
It has been such an interesting little experiment, and this is just the first phase.
Reflect. Start the conversation. Indulge in the loves of your life. And tell someone. Tell everyone.
Happy Valentine’s Day.