This week I tried sitting down and writing about a few different topics that I had floating through my mind. After a few days, I realized that this was no longer possible as I am still grieving the loss of my cat of six years. While I have tried to suppress the sadness, I have realized that the only way I can truly overcome this is by facing it head-on. So, here is my a letter to my orange beauty, my kitty that I got almost exactly six years ago-- my Sandy.
Dear Sandy,
Watching you grow up with the rest of the animals has surely brought me some of my best days. However, watching you suffer through an unsolvable illness has presented me with some of my most somber. I know that letting you live a painless life up in heaven was the best option, but why does it feel like I didn't do enough? Why does I feel like I did love enough? Why did it have to be you? I may never know the answers to these questions, and I am starting to understand that pondering them is not grievance you deserve. With that said, I would like to say thank you.
Thank you for continuously being that silly little peach that was always eager to play. Thank you for the dozens of scratch marks that I never thought I could come to appreciate so dearly. Thank you for waiting for us in the window when we came home from a hard day. Thank you for cuddling beside me when I cried-- I can only hope that you're here in spirit with these seemingly unaccompanied tears. Thank you for all of your kitty smiles, meows and purrs-- plainly and simply, thank you for being my little peach for six blessed years.
Sincerely,
Elizabeth
I know that time heals all wounds-- I understand that as days, weeks and months pass I will feel better. But now, in this exact moment, I feel utterly heartbroken, and those are feelings I need to respect and confront now.
Sandy was not "just a cat", she was a member of my family, a monument part of my life. She was companion that was there when I ate my breakfast, or when laid on my yoga mat and exercised. She is in a happier, safer and more peaceful place-- not a day will go by when I don't think of my little peach.
